i am so bored. the more bored i am the more i think about nate and the more that makes me sad. i was ok when i woke up..had a bunch of dreams about him last night, some weird, some normal…i had an insanely bad headache that woke me up at 7 this morning. it was really unbareable. i had to get up and take some drugs, and try to sleep it off – thankfully it worked. cuz i wouldn’t have been able to function if it hadn’t gone away. but i need something to do. i hate that this is going to continue since i’m going to be working nights…i’ll have my days full of nothing to do with myself, with no one around (if i even had any friends – they seriously will all be gone after the xmas breaks). i keep joking that it doesn’t matter if i have night shifts, i have no friends to hang out with at night anyway. it’d suck if they were here, cuz i’d never see them. or if nate was here…i’d get to see him 2 nights a week, since assuming he’d have a normal job, he’d be working days. if he was still here something would have to be done with my work schedule…anyway…

i downloaded the game Risk and i can’t win to save my life. i get screwed right from the start and can’t recover. stupid game.

i’m a bit…confused and slightly irritated.

the people i’m going to have to work with are…less than bright. maybe they’re just normal, but i’m kinda doubting there intelligence is at an average level. mainly because our job is SO easy, and people still don’t get it.

to top it off…apparently some of us were hired from the get go to be supervisors. there are 2 women in my training class, who have no experience with the rest of us, but are going to be supervisors when we open. ok fine. the one woman, i found out today, used to work at wilson farms…maybe she was a manager, but SO WAS I!!!!!….she claimed to be good at computers, so last week she was using the computer that was being projected onto the screen…AND HAD NO CLUE WHAT SHE WAS DOING! didn’t know where keys were, didn’t know what keys to press. today, she still isn’t clear on some procedures we have to do…and she’s going to be supervising me?…the 2nd lady. she is stone dumb. she asks questions about things we’ve been covering every day since we started…she still doesn’t get that all we do is TYPE! DATA. ENTRY! we don’t touch money, we don’t fill out forms, all we do is type in the info on the forms that are given to us by the floor supervisor. that’s it. and i guess she FINALLY realized this today. but then she didn’t know where we get the info to type onto the computer from…i felt like turning around and smacking her. really. there is something wrong with her that she can’t grasp this stuff. IT’S BEYOND EASY! and she’s going to be a supervisor…

and then, get this…first of all i was singled out today to lead group review kind of things with the “teachers”…great, they realize i’m more than capable of doing this job….but then, there was a 3rd “teacher” in with us today. the teachers are just the people who are going to be supervisors who already know this stuff cuz they worked in casinos before…this 3rd teacher worked some place else, but just got hired now so she hasn’t gone through any of the training. she’ll be working swing shifts, with me…and so our teacher tells this new supervisor to come to ME with any questions and problems, and for ME to teach her stuff. AND SHE’S GOING TO BE A SUPERVISOR AND I’M NOT! WHAT THE HELL!!!! how does that work?! they can plainly see i’m capable of doing the job, and capable of being a supervisor if i’m supposed to be teaching her….

all i know is i better get promoted real soon…i’ll give it the 90 day probation period until i ask to be promoted. there is no reason why i shouldn’t be first in line to move up…that’s all i gotta say.