work was irritating. boring as hell too. for the record, if anyone who reads this ever ends up working at a casino, just realize that if you’re on swing shift you will always get screwed one way or another. tonight it was being forced to change cards for grave shift, even tho they shouldn’t be changed til 4am – when grave takes over. day shift doesn’t change the 8pm cards for us when we come in, why should we have to change cards for grave?

i really want to completely redo this site. as in, redo all the content. i haven’t updated anything in months/years. the most recent pics are of me and nate nov 2002…i haven’t updated any of the “thoughts/opinions” because i have the blog to do all my writing. the me section is useless really… so i might start redoing shit.

as if i didn’t have a big ass important website to completely overhaul.

i have no motivation.

i work at 6 tomorrow. i keep thinking there was something i had to do monday. i have to buy some groceries, but i keep thinking there was something that was going to prevent me from getting groceries tomorrow. oh well. if i don’t remember it must not have been important.

i had a dream about anthony last night that is really disturbing me. i thought it was weird all day, when i remembered i had it, but then seeing him at work it’s just like….no…erase that dream out of my head please. LOL. i told him about it sorta – left out the disturbing part. it involved a haunted house, anthony ringing church bells, and high school. and yeah…disturbing.

i should sleep now.

update to my new years resolutions.
1. ab workout – failing miserably. i’ll blame it this time on the computer dying for more or less 2 weeks. can’t do the work out if my comp cant play the mpeg. in january, if i did it 6 times, that’s pushing it. will try to do better now.
2. cuticals – was doing ok, but started slipping. but it’s not as bad as it has been in the past

i don’t remember any of my other resolutions.

but i decided that i swear too much. so i’m going to try to only swear in chinese from now on. that way it doesn’t seem like i’m swearing.

i sorta like the person i am right now. i have been thinking alot about lots of things the last 2 weeks. one of the things was sorta spurred on by things james and i talked about when he was here. relationship things, and i’ve been trying to think of the ways nate changed me in our short time together. i came up with a list. i’m not going to post the list. but he made me a better person in my own head (if no one else thinks so haha). we’ll leave it at that.

i’m looking forward to things to come in the next few months. i think. i hope. haha i’m being hopefull that things will work out the way i want them to.

and i did nothing at work today. seriously. they didn’t open my section so i sat in the office and handed out pay checks for 4 hours. txt msged with leighanne, had an hour break, and then jumped around doing pushes, and closing random tables until 3:20. 9-5 tomorrow. i have to meet with a guy at the NACC at 3 to discuss their website, the rest of the day is open if anyone is bored, you know how to reach me.

stabbing westwards “darkest days” – brilliant album. i repeat, not good to listen to if going through a break up, but brilliant none the less. still contains one of the best lines in “alternative” music…. from “save yourself”…”i am not your savior, i am just as fucked as you”.

there was a weird moment at turning stone i forgot to mention. one of the bacc dealers came back from break, and says “i assume you are sara” and i’m like yup. then it occured to me, no one had said my name, so i didn’t know how he knew who i was. he came back from a break later on and said “jim says hi”…which made sense. jim is the guy i sorta not really had a double date with, when he was here visiting jenn and jeff. so jim must have told the kid my name. but then that’s still weird cuz that meant people were talking about me in the turning stone employee cafeteria….

and i have now assumed responsibilities for the niagara arts and cultural center’s website. i gotta start redesigning and putting a few demo layouts together.

comp died again. the good dr brian took it back to the hospital on wednesday and i got it back from him today. things seem fine as of now. LOL just gimme a few days, it’ll die again.

so

1. wednesday. brian and james came over and we grabbed food at dennys before watching “lost in translation”. i have yet to wrap my mind around the film. it was beautiful visually. tokyo is off the hook. i can’t imagine living there. jerry had said he saw me in the movie (not literally of course), but i’m not sure i agree with that. i dunno.

“Brian and james” makes me think of bartylls and james wine coolers. saying “james and brian” just won’t work in my head LOL.

so brian and james left after the movie, and i read a bit, and then couldn’t fall asleep to save my life. tom called at 4 cuz i had txt messaged him earlier, and we talked about stuff. apparently, i have the ability to “glow” in email. LOL. let me explain. a few days ago i had asked him a question that i wasn’t able to elaborate on, as to my reasons for asking, while at work. so i had emailed him my story and blahblahblah. he said just reading the email he could tell that i was glowing. he made some good points in our conversation. so that’s good.

my txt msging bill for this month is going to be outrageous (since i didn’t subscribe to it) just from wednesday alone..let alone yesterday, where i msg’ed leighanne like 293497 times.

2. thursday. it was the turning stone trip for anthony’s birthday. aside from the speeding ticket outside of syracuse we had THE BEST TIME. omg it was so much fun. it was me, anthony, tony, and dave. played 10$ bacc all day. lost a bunch of money, and somehow i won most of it back on roulette. shock of shocks. I SWEAR ITS A HOUSE GAME. bacc was so much fun. anthony ended up winning a fucking grand. even tho we weren’t all winners, we all agreed that it was super fun and we made a pact to get together more often on our days off. there were a few scary moments on the way home, anthony driving crazy in the snow. weather got shitty real fast, but the snow changed to rain when we hit batavia so it wasn’t too bad on the home stretch. but yeah. tons of fun.

so today. got my comp back from brian, here putting things back in order, then work tonight at 8. funwow. and i think i figured out why my cell phone caller ID doesn’t show ppls names. ppl just need to call me now. like brian. call me. see if it works. if it works, i’ll change everyone’s settings. you can just call and hang up.

I HATE MY COMPUTER

can’t run comp long enough to bother with a post. fucking piece of shit computer

i forgot how great stabbing westward was. depressing at times, but really fantastic. just can’t pay alot of attention to the words if you just broke up with someone hahaha.

lalalalalalalaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

from my aunt trudy: “I’m not surprised you got a promotion as when I watched you that time I was impressed at how quick and professional you were. and very attractive, too. Almost oriental in a way and I am sure some guy is going to fall for you.”

I AM NOT ASIAN!!!!!!!!!!!!

tonight was full of irritations. the end.

and my internet sucks

Singer Janet Jackson, left, covers her breast after her outfit came undone during a number with Justin Timberlake during the halftime show of Super Bowl XXXVIII in Houston, Sunday, Feb. 1, 2004.
haha they actually have a picture of her boob ROFL

BAD JUSTIN LOL…look it that look of death on janets face. that’s fantastic.

and now, a joke

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at thePearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, “What are all those clocks?”

St. Peter answered, “Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a
Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.

“Oh,” said the man, “whose clock is that?”

“That’s Mother Teresa’s. The hands have never moved, indicating that shenever told a lie.

“Incredible,” said the man.

“And whose clock is that one?”

St. Peter responded, “That’s Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life.”

“Where’s Bush’s clock?” asked the man.

“Bush’s clock is in Jesus’ office. He’s using it as a Ceiling fan.”

HAH
other than that, the euphoria has crashed. i’m not feeling good about anything anymore really. at least it lasted a few days.

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

thank you nin hotline for mentioning the fact that trent (with really bad hair) was at bowie’s LA show a few days ago. cuz that prompted me to go to davidbowie.com to see if there were any pictures…which led me to find out

BOWIE IS PLAYING AT SHEAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHEAS!!!!!!!!!!!! not the arena, not the stadium, little teenie SHEAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

holy crap. presale at 5pm, MUST GET TICKETS!!!!!!!!!!

ug. i am in so much pain right now it’s not funny. i can barely move my arms. fucking sitdown blackjack game. i almost cried on my game. it hurt so bad i couldn’t speak. i’d do anything for a massage right now.

somehow i managed to sleep until 3!!! i couldn’t get to sleep from being in pain, and the dull ache in my shoulder. i’m gonna have to dry my hair after my shower now blah.

oh and i got my new dresser yesterday. they woke me up at 9 and 10 when the movers called. then the came at 11, and brought the dresser inside in a box…when i cut the box off, it was facing the wrong direction. so i had to call my parents to help me move it, which was a good idea. cuz i realized i’d never be able to attach the mirror on my own anyway. i like it. but my comforter doesn’t match, so i need a new one. haha. i bought a new alarm clock on ebay too, it’s this rad little chrome clock attached to a big spring LOL. but trust me, it looks neat.

i was trying to figure out why my phone’s caller ID doesn’t display the names of who is calling me, just their number – even if they’re number is in my phone book. so i played around with it, maybe it’ll work now. someone just needs to call me now lol

i am currently in love with my life. i got an email from one of my parents friends, in response to my “change of phone number” email. she said my mom told her that i enjoy my job and am happy with my life. which i thought was wonderful. cuz i’m used to hearing my mom talk about how they’re dissapointed about grad school and that i’m not using my degree and blahblahblah. it’s nice for my mom to notice i am (for the most part) happy.

and i had a lovely day.

and leighanne and i are now in charge of a pretty large important project with the ctrc, which is exciting.

chilled here tonight with adrienne after getting dinner (which i will add, my stomach is being wacky and i can’t eat), did interesting makeup, watched zootv and drooled over macphisto, etc etc etc.

stuff is going on my head right now that i don’t know how to make sense of, but i am completely happy with that.

stupid internet is so messed up. but i loaded alot of stuff back onto the comp. i figure when i go to look for something and cant find it, i’ll go through all the disks to locate whatever i’ve forgotten. rad.

i’ve gotten 12thousand virus emails today. yay

i’m baaaaaaaaaaack!!! special loud thanks to brian for fixing khruschev for me. i’m not worthy.

so in the past 2 days i….

haven’t done much. worked tuesday night, most boring night ever. wednesday leighanne arrived, and we got dinner at the mafia restaurant. came back here to wait for the guests. i had a really nice time with everyone here. except for the fact that the metropolis dvd was corrupted, so after chapter 23 we had to finish the movie on the shit ass version dvd i have. and o.m.g the quality between the two!!!! it’s like the restored version is a completely different movie. such a good movie, so brilliant visually. esp now that i can actually SEE stuff in the restored version. i’d love to have a set of prints from it.

sat around after the movie, and then headed to denny’s. went to the one near delta sonic since mine is closed. it’s so ghetto. totally going to have to go to maple from now on. ug. it’s so far. ran into danyell from mcds, hadn’t seen her in a long time. we played cards LOL. came back here and adr and brian left. i throughly kicked james ass in dr mario. just chilled here talking and fell asleep for 5 hours.

so thank you everyone for making it such a cool night. at least i thought it was cool haha.

the plan for today is to pay my studio rent, head out down town probably, look at places for sale/rent, and the ctrc meeting. tonight is up in the air.