Top Ten Teen-years Albums

This was floating around facebook the last few days.

List 10 albums that made a lasting impression on you as a TEENAGER, but only one per band/artist. In approximate chronological order of when I found them.

1. Aerosmith – Get a Grip (1993) – I wasn’t sure this fell into my teen years, until I looked up the release date, and saw that it had to. This is the first CD I remember wanting to buy on my own. My clique of friends all had it, and we were scandalized that there were nipple prints on the CD.
2. Salt n Pepa – Very Necessary (1993) – I loved this record, I listened to it a ton with headphones when I got my first portable CD player, in my room, doing my homework, even though I had a perfectly working stereo. Thinking of this record got “None Of Your Business” in my head last night. Awesome.
3. Stone Temple Pilots – Purple (1994) – While I still don’t really think of them as “grunge”, I guess this is the first grunge cd I loved and listened to all the time (I owned Pearl Jam’s “Ten” but never listened to it).
4. REM – Monster (1994) – I listened to this, and the STP record, all the time when I was playing my Super Nintendo. In retrospect I’m not really sure why I liked this record, but at the time it was great.
5. The Cranberries – No Need To Argue (1994) – Zombie still is a fantastic song. The rest is a bit mellow, but it holds up.
6. Elastica – Elastica (1995) – I heard the song “Connection” while hanging out in Media Play and bought the CD. I remember writing song lyrics on the desk in study hall, only to see that someone had written the next line after. Turns out that someone was Marney.
7. Michael Jackson – HIStory (1995) – 2 records have changed my life. This was the first. It led me to travel, spend a lot of money, and most importantly, led me to meet some of the best friends who I still have to this day. Awww.
8. U2 – Achtung Baby (1991) – Not discovered until I was at Geneseo, and not appreciated upon first listens, when I listened to it months later, it’s brilliance blinded me. So amazing.
9. Nine Inch Nails – The Fragile (1999) – The 2nd life changing record. Even if it took 6 years for it to make a huge impact as far as leading me to travel and meet great people, this was an emotionally impactful record. I really don’t know what my life would be like if I had never fallen down the NIN-hole.
10. Orgy – Candyass (1998) – Orgy was the first band I met, and was the band responsible for getting me into seeing concerts, and following tours, and trying to meet bands and get autographs. They were fun, and super cute, yay boys in makeup.

The Jacksons @ UB

So now I’ve seen all the Jacksons…or well the ones that matter. I saw a commercial a few weeks ago for The Jacksons playing at UB. It was on a Saturday, and I thought it was Thanksgiving Saturday, so I let it go because it was the one Saturday this month I didn’t have off. But then it turns out, nope, it was the 21st, which I did have off. I still let it go, I didn’t feel like spending any money on it, and I wouldn’t be able to find anyone to go with. But then my friend Melissa posted on fb that her son was selling tickets for $10 to benefit his jazz band at the high school so then I found it hard to say no. I bought 2 tickets in the chance I’d get someone to go, but in the end I went by myself.

I didn’t realize there were only 4 of them performing, and I didn’t know which one was missing. I thought it was Jackie cuz I thought he played guitar back in the day, and only Tito was playing (and Jermaine sometimes) but they finally did “call outs” to each other, and turns out Jackie was there and it was Randy who was missing.  They played just over an hour and it actually was pretty good. Honestly I wanted to cry the first few songs, every time it was an MJ part being sung by one of the others. I got over it. Jermaine seemed like he was kinda phoning it in, he wasn’t as into it as Jackie and Marlon (and Tito plays guitar, so really, how into dancing can he be?). They looked like they were having fun though. And all the songs are classics by now, so it was cool to hear them. I love Can You Feel It, and This Place Hotel was good. I was surprised at State of Shock, though I don’t know why. It felt like they played more than this setlist says, but probably because of the middle medley.

The MJ covers were “safe” for them to do, I think. No mega hits, like Jermaine trying to perform Billie Jean or something that would be sacrilegious haha. But Can’t Let Her Get Away was an odd choice. The music was not recognizable to me but the lyrics were and I couldn’t figure it out until the chorus. Hey, it’s been a long time since I listened to Dangerous lol plus it was live and changed a bit.

Jermaine kept taking out his ear piece, just like MJ was doing in This Is It, so now I’m watching it again haha.

So it was good, I’m glad I went though I’m not sure I’d have paid a ton to go. It was fun and it made me smile even if I was sad too.

Can You Feel It
Blame It on the Boogie
I Wanna Be Where You Are
Rock With You
Enjoy Yourself
Show You the Way to Go
Lovely One
2300 Jackson Street (Video Interlude)
I Want You Back / ABC / The Love You Save / Dancing Machine / Never Can Say Goodbye / I’ll Be There
Can’t Let Her Get Away
This Place Hotel
Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’
State of Shock
Shake Your Body (Down to the Ground)


Tonight was Michael Jackson: The Immortal World Tour Cirque du Soleil show with LeighAnne in Hamilton. Feels like I bought the tickets forever ago, because I think it was a year ago haha. I hate that.

Anyway. We headed out with google directions, which took me a way that I’ve never taken before, and instead of trusting them (also because we were on a street named not what the directions said), i thought we were going the wrong way and turned around. only that wasn’t the right way either, and after turning on data roaming, we ended up going back the way the original directions said…a nice tour through the Hamilton steel district, and low class homes instead of the usual highway route. Google maps fail. So with all that, we were 15 minutes late to the show. I’m not sure how much we missed since we saw all of MJ’s “main” songs in the rest of the show *shrug*. (edit: ooh, maybe dirty diana? if it’s not in the set, it should be)

Overall I thought it was very good. However having never seen a Cirque show before, I expected much more acrobatics and people flying around than there was. It was much more about the music and dancing, than flying around in the air. There still were some flying acts, and acrobats, and one pole dancer but…just expected more of that (perhaps the permanent “more theatrical” vegas show in 2013 will have more of it). I think MJ would be happy with it, they did a good job paying tribute to him and his style. Highlights were “Smooth Criminal” and “Human Nature”. There was a really creepy bit with a giant gloved hand and giant mj shoes/socks haha. The songs I don’t like because they are lame, I still didn’t like in the show (ahem, childhood, gone too soon). They did a lot of older Jacksons stuff too, which was nice, since I’d never seen them live.

After sitting in the parking ramp for a half hour, I remembered not to park in ramps at events 😛 We hit up a gas station on the way home to get weird flavors of chips…we got extreme dill doritos (groossss), spicy thai doritos (yum), roasted chicken (actually pretty good, didn’t taste like chicken, more like spices you’d put on poultry), spicy ketchup (much like regular ketchup) and…what’s it called? like “everything” flavor which really was mostly bbq. I also picked up a Coffee Crisp milk…not as good as I expected, definitely inferior to Intense Chocolate Milk, but it’s ok.

I had a good time with Lei, definitely enjoyed the show! Yay!

Michael, a cd review.

My running review of Michael Jackson’s new CD “Michael”. Obviously, he’s dead, so the album was put together from unfinished demos and other recordings.

1. Hold My Hand (duet with Akon) – Not listening to pop music except for at work, I don’t really know Akon (except I think he threw a fan who got on stage into the crowd and was sued or something). It’s not amazing, it’s fairly catchy, pretty “vanilla”. But it stands out on the album, and sounds like the most finished of the bunch.

2. Hollywood Tonight – Again, nothing special. Classic MJ beat box. Album liner lyrics are wrong, which is always irritating to me. Proofread people, proofread. Vocals are clearly demo, I don’t think it’s “production” or an autotune making it sound weird to me, it’s just MJ not being perfect.

3. Keep Your Head Up – beginning already sounds sappy and lame. Boring, so boring. I don’t hate it, it’s just boring. There are much better “uplifting” MJ songs to choose from if you need one.

4. (I Like) The Way You Love Me – I was attempting an unbiased review, but maybe that’s impossible since I just find pop music to be so boring. Sounds like it’s been sung over a telephone. The auto tune production, which I understand was probably necessary, is annoying. Does nothing for me. Kinda annoying.

5. Monster (featuring 50 cent) – more upbeat, but played out subject matter (paparazzi). More my style, might actually listen to it again haha.

6. Best Of Joy – gag. 50 seconds in and i’m not even going to bother finishing it. next.

7. Breaking News – the first “single”, the most controversial with people claiming it’s not him. Sounds like him to me, Hollywood Tonight sounds less like him than this one. But clearly it had to be worked into a complete song, with vocals added in sections. Whatever, doesn’t make it not him. Again, played out subject matter about the media/paparazzi/tabloids. It’s not bad, upbeat. I’m indifferent, leaning towards it being ok.

8. (I Can’t Make It) Another Day (featuring Lenny Kravitz) – clearly the best song on the album, written by Lenny Kravitz. Guitars, upbeat. Like. Dave Grohl on drums, neat.

9. Behind the Mask – not what i was expecting. It’s faster and upbeat, and I assumed it was some lame song about himself ha. It’s strange, can’t say if I like it or not. It’s the type of vocals I like, strong and clear. One of the songs that seem older to me, a mix of Off The Wall and Bad (ha sounds strange eh?). I think I like it, definitely deserving of more listens.

10. Much Too Soon – gag. boring. will never listen again.

I don’t think I can even venture to give it a grade. It’s not groundbreaking or mind blowing, and in general is kind of generic. Overall, the thought of listening to it doesn’t make me cringe like Invincible. Maybe it’s because MJ DIDN’T have a final say in the songs, that they don’t sound like he is an old man trying too hard to fit into current music (like Invincible). But on the other hand, I’m not sure he’d be happy having the world hear these songs unfinished, or finished by other hands. I have little to no interest in listening to the album again, and after I copy a few songs for the car, it’ll sit on the shelf.

I wish the liner notes had dates listed…like, year the demo was made because some sound like they might be recent and some older, and it’s something I’d just like to know.

So much controversy regarding, is it him singing, is it not him, was it all faked…I guess I don’t understand what all the shock and surprise is, regarding it sounding “funny”…They weren’t finished songs, they weren’t finished vocals, they sometimes are clearly demos. So what did people expect? It wasn’t a finished record MJ was just sitting on when he died, and people had to take what was there and make it into a finished product for release. So that might have meant adding old MJ vocals, running them through autotune and other processing techniques, having other people fill in vocals as backup or for layering. To me, this is not a shock, and it doesn’t mean they are fake. Maybe I just know too much about what goes into making an album that I am just not surprised. It is completely what I expected.

And for those who point to the Jackson family claims that it is not MJ singing…what the hell would they know? When was the last time a Jackson who is not Janet, was involved in MJ recording (and even that was 15 years ago)? Thriller? Even before? Joe Jackson was fired a long long time ago, and MJ wasn’t exactly on good terms with his family the last few years. So what would they know about how or when he recorded any of this. So of ANYONE’s claims that it is not really MJ singing, theirs would be the least reliable.

Kinda sad that I know this is not full of the best demos that MJ had to offer. Disappointed that Blue Gangsta, which can be found on youtube, is not on the album. But I guess Sony has a contract for 29738629727 MJ albums, it’s bound to end up on one of them. I hope the estate can find more (better) archival songs to release. I may not listen to this record ever again, but I will still pay attention to future releases in the hopes of finding a gem. This one doesn’t have any.

possibly the worst book i ever read

One day I was surfing YouTube and some Michael Jackson conspiracy video (possibly how the Illuminati killed him, or how he predicted 9/11) had a link to the web page for this book, “Michael Jackson Backdoor to Neverland: Exposing the King of Pop’s SECRET Mindsets” and I thought “Ok, I’ll bite.” I found the website to be entertaining, and I figured, why not. I was hoping the book would be terribly amusing, but instead it was just terrible.

Where to even begin? I could point out inaccuracies, or pure idiocy on every page. Let’s start with something that I just found irritating. Mr Gautier claims that Michael Jackson was nicknamed “Bambi”…I’ve been a Jackson fan for over half of my life, and do not remember him ever being called Bambi. But that’s ok, maybe I just missed that along the way, no big deal. But Mr Gautier insists on calling Jackson “Bambi”, “The Thriller”, or just “MJ” throughout the book which is not only disrespectful but completely unprofessional.

As for the content, Mr Gautier bases his arguments about Jackson’s “secret mindsets” on single lines from interviews out of context, information from Jackson’s ghost written auto-biography, and questionable books from supposed associates of Jackson. Not only are his theories about Jackson’s mental state completely “out there” with no evidence, and no basis in real psychology, his facts are sometimes COMPLETELY wrong (see also: page 120, writing about the 2005 criminal trial and describing Janet Arvizo’s testimony regarding how she urged her children to lie in a previous lawsuit, suddenly he claims it’s the Chandler family, which is incorrect).

Really, this book is a joke. I find it hard to believe that Mr Gautier has any formal training in psychology, as claimed. He insists that Jackson thought of himself as an orphan, the son of a king, that he WAS a king, that he was suicidal and murderous, and that he hates his family and worked to ruin their careers (all with zero evidence). He claims Jackson bought the ATV music catalog, which includes The Beatles catalog, and others for ego reasons (it couldn’t possibly have been a good business move) and he married Lisa Marie Presley to symbolically “dethrone” the King.

Lines such as “And with his shortened pants, MJ seems to tell us: My body has grown too fast, but my heart is still that of a child! These shortened pants similarly reflect an asexuality common to fairytales, comics or cartoon characters.” make you think to yourself, “seriously??” And it only gets worse, with the author trying to make a comparison between Jackson and Elvis Presley based on the fact that Elvis had a twin who died, and Jackson had a brother with a twin who died, and comparing Jackson to Aleister Crowley.

I would love to get into more of the insane and idiotic things in this book, but it’s making my head hurt and I don’t want to have to read it again to find the choicest paragraphs to speak about. I can only warn you that the book doesn’t even deserve 1 star. It was in no way amusing or entertaining, definitely not enlightening or educational, and while reading it I just kept thinking, “Really? Seriously? How did this even get published?”

Please don’t waste your time on this garbage.

Dan Lacey, my favourite painter

ok this is too good not to post about. i have a new favourite painter on earth and his name is dan lacey. i really don’t know anything about him, his site is kinda confusing, he apparently paints pictures of people with pancakes on their head…but check this shit out…

dear god. that is so…there are no words, but i almost need it. it is a shame that dan lacey does not sell prints. then on his site, i find a whole page full of MJ paintings, including…


see the rest at: there is a nice one of MJ with tupac. in his blog he promises a new MJ portrait, of him holding an oil covered pelican! i can’t wait!

and then there is a whole page of paintings of obama riding unicorns ROFL. my personal favourite is obama riding a unicorn which is stabbing a…bull? buffalo? that sarah palin is riding LOL. omg. so much brilliance i can hardly breathe. and the one with obama, stalin and…house? lol!

and you probably think this post is full of sarcasm, but i am totally serious, this guy is my new hero.

OH WAIT HE DOES SELL PRINTS! i’m in trouble now, how do i choose which to get?!?!

a special thanks to leighanne for directing me to, where i discovered the jacko and jesus painting. i don’t know what i did without knowing this artist LOL

last minute addition….definitely need

the michael jackson conspiracy

a few weeks ago Laura mentioned that the Discovery ID channel has a show called True Crime with Aphrodite Jones which was doing an episode on the Michael Jackson trial. She is a true crime author and reporter who covered the trial for Fox News (i think – don’t hold that against her haha). the show was a 1 hour overview of all the problems that the DA’s case against him had, and went through the evidence (or “evidence”) and how the aquittal came about. Laura mentioned that she had the book Aphrodite Jones had written called Michael Jackson Conspiracy and she let me borrow it.

The book is based upon all of the trial transcripts and officially submitted evidence. Jones wrote the book because once the trial was over she realized that the media’s coverage of the entire trial was completely biased to the prosecution, and that the media had already convicted MJ and only reported things that would make people believe he had done the crimes. They ignored, or glossed over all of the many many holes in the prosecution’s case, as well as testimony from defense witnesses that supported MJ. So the book goes through the entire trial, all the major witnesses, and does a really good job at showing that MJ was innocent.

The Arvizo family who made the accusations are/were nutcases, and that is really really clear in the transcripts of their testimony. Especially the mother. It is pretty obvious they were targeting various celebrities to give them money and “stuff” by using Gavin’s cancer to make people feel bad for them. It wasn’t just MJ….MJ was just the most naive, and most easily taken advantage of. And of course, there is the seed that was planted in 1993 that he was a child molester which makes it that much easier to target him.

Now when I became a fan in 95 and learned about the 93 allegations, I decided they weren’t true. Having read the GQ article “Was Michael Jackson Framed?” it’s pretty clear that the Chandler family (or maybe just Evan, do not RIP) was pretty shady and out to extort money from MJ. Well they succeeded and MJ was branded as a pedophile despite the fact that a settlement does not imply guilt (in fact, in Jones book, his defense attorney thinks the reason for the settlement was that MJs handlers thought that $20 million was a drop in the bucket compared to what MJ would earn through tours and merchandise if he wasn’t involved in a trial…and thus money THEY would be making as well). Having one family succesfully extort money from MJ, and MJ’s continued preference to spend time with children and help those in need…the door was left open for other opportunists to show up. And that’s what the Arvizos did.

I’m not sure that their initial intention was to bilk him of millions through a settlement…or that they even planned ahead to accuse him of molestation, but it is totally clear that they were using him and other celebrities (George Lopez, Jay Leno and Chris Tucker testified about the family in the trial). MJ made it convenient for people to take advantage of him.

The book was very interesting, and included some things that were a bit surprising to me.
1. MJ was a porn freak. LOL this is not something I ever expected to hear about him, as to me, I never thought he was gay, I just thought he was asexual. He could dance sexily on stage and in videos, but in real life it just didn’t seem to me that he was that interested in any one, men or women. But apparenly he had quite the collection of porn mags kept in briefcases in the back of his closet. I guess he had a thing for playboy and hustler LOL. Well good for him, makes him seem like a normal dude. Now if only he had some Girls Gone Wild dvds in his collection….
2. MJ drank alot of alcohol. Again, this is not something I expected to hear because he always said that he didn’t drink or do drugs (well I guess we know now he was a bit of a drug addict). In trying to make the case that MJ was giving alcohol to kids, it came out that he drank on flights, he drank in his room, he drank with guests…he drank. Wine, vodka, tequila, jack daniels…The DA wasn’t able to prove that MJ ever gave the Arvizo kids alcohol, and in fact witnesses stated that the kids had broken into MJ’s wine cellar on their own.

Something not quite as surprising, as I always suspected it…MJ seemed to not have a clue what people around him were doing. The DA tried to make the case that MJ held the Arvizos hostage, or conspired to…which…even without knowing anything about the trial and evidence always seemed preposterous. The book makes it clear the charge was pretty much entirely made up by Janet Arvizo. But in the testimony, witnesses talked about MJs handlers, and how it seemed that they did whatever they wanted, were greedy, and MJ didn’t know what was going on. It always kinda seemed like that to me, because the last 15 years were filled with alot of seemingly bad ideas.

Since the book used the court transcripts and official evidence, it’s pretty clear why the jury acquitted MJ of all charges. The DA just wasn’t able to prove anything, and the things that they considered to be “smoking guns”, Tom Meserau (MJ’s lead lawyer) poked full of holes. The media made it seem like it was an open and shut case, and that he was guilty, but in reality it was not even close.

Once again I am convinced of MJ’s innocence. I do have to admit when the accusations were made for a 2nd time, I had to give pause to really think if he was capable of it. But it’s clear that both the Chandlers and Arvizos were looking for cash. MJ made it easy for them to try to get it.

I have to wonder though…if he had been conviced and gone to jail, would he still be alive? Would it matter if he was alive, but in jail? I suppose not, since even when he got out, I doubt anyone would have supported him or his career after that. I always thought he’d die in jail if he had gone, or comitted suicide, but maybe he was stronger than we all think. Or if this accusation and trial had never happened, would he have had so many problems that led to his insomnia and Conrad Murray and the propofol. What if the 93 allegations had never happened, would he have continued to be the massive superstar he was in the 80s and early 90s, or would his career have dropped off for some other reason. I would really love to hear from Jordie Chandler, as he would not cooperate with the 05 trial in any way…Clear MJ’s name, from the horses mouth, because the general public is never going to read this book, and never going to know the truth.


dreams: i was reading a book about inxs by one of the other members of the band. in the dream his name was mike corleon, but i think in real life, it would have been tim. it was written in very thick australian slang/accent and it was hard to understand, but it was nice to read about hutch and all their stories from the road. then i remembered i had a special inxs cd that was part of some kind of learn to cook program LOL so suddenly i was at my parents house looking for this cd. apparently it had reworked inxs songs that instead were instructions on how to cook. i was mad tho cuz my mom had gotten rid of it.

i was at neverland again, being let inside with 4 other people to hang with MJ who was clearly still alive and living there. paris was at the gate to greet us and let us in, and she hugged us all, and when it came to my turn, it was a weird ackward hug, and i couldn’t think of anything to say to her but “you are a very cute little girl”. when we got inside MJ was talking to his assistant about physics.

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas.

Wow it’s been a month since I last posted. I’ve had nothing to say really.

So one good thing that MJ’s death has brought, is getting back in touch with so many friends from “back in the day”. Facebook has made it so much easier to find eachother and stay in touch, and we’ve actually gone back to chat on IRC haha. One thing that has come out of all of it, is that I’m going to Los Angeles to meet up with Emily, who I haven’t seen since London 97, and Jackie who I never met. We’re trying to get some of the other “foos” to join us too. It just started as a whim road trip, doing the MJ “tour” of the star, cement hands, his grave…and ue-ing neverland. Disneyland came up, and the fact that I’d never been astounded Em and Jac and it became part of the trip too. We joked that it’d be awesome if Disney brought back Captain Eo…and LOW AND BEHOLD THEY ARE!!! It’ll be back playing starting in Feb, just in time for our trip (March 4-11)!!! SO EXCITED. AND…I am so excited about taco trucks hahahah. The whole trip is gonna be ridiculous fun. We’re gonna try to see the Price is Right, and get down to San Diego for Sea World too. Any other suggestions on things to do from people out in the area are welcome. I know pretty much nothing about LA since I never really had the desire to go haha.

I recently realized that this is the end of the decade, and that sorta amazed me. It feels like I was just with Carolyn in Toronto for the millenium, freezing watching fireworks. Time is flying for sure. 7 years at the casino, 6 more months until 30….I find new grey hairs every day. It’s stressing me out hahaha I’m going to stay 27 if that is ok.

This Is It

I ended up going to see the Michael Jackson movie, This Is It, by myself today. It was probably for the better, I didn’t cry, but quite a few times especially in the beginning I wanted to.

I don’t know where to start in “reviewing” it. I think it is a fascinating look into what goes into putting together a giant pop music spectacle. It’s also a great look at Michael as a person and as a brilliant performer. He knew exactly what he wanted from the band and the dancers and what was best for the “show”. (“it needs to simmer” haha) I think some people take it for granted, what a great talent he was. He wasn’t like pop singers now, who get songs handed to them, videos put together for them, and they just show up and do it. MJ had his hands in every aspect of his career – he wrote songs and music, he came up with video concepts, he choreographed, designed sets and costumes. He was an artistic genius, even if you are not a fan of pop music. The songs are just absolute classics, perfect pop songs. I forget sometimes. The movie showed him at his most comfortable, I think, at work, on stage doing what he loved. He was in control, he was himself. He was likeable, and not at all “weird”.

There were times where you could tell MJ was not giving it his all, since all this footage was just from rehearsals, and it was still fantastic. This was going to be a great show. I was so completely impressed at how much he actually sang. As MJ fans know (and Britney Spears fans ha), pop stars do not sing live alot. The HIStory tour was mostly lipsynched, and I expected that to hold true if these shows had ever happened. But nope, the majority of the songs they showed were sung live and were incredible. He still had quite the voice (though “black or white” seemed akward being sung high, same with the end of “earth song”). “Human Nature” is always a favourite of mine for showing off his voice and it didn’t disappoint. “The Way You Make Me Feel”, which I so badly wanted to see at my 2 HIStory shows, was great. “Thriller” had a funky cool ending and great visuals to go along with it. “Man in the Mirror” got to me, but like I said, I managed not to cry.

I wish they would have shown more of the aerialists and “pole dancers”, or mentioned what song they were performing in at the very least. That could have been amazingly cool (I can only hope it was “Who Is It”, since it was being played during that part, but I doubt it).

The filmed bits for songs like “Smooth Criminal” and “Thriller” were cool and had a musical theatre vibe to them that I liked. But I’m slightly disappointed that the routines were all from the past. For MJ wanting to give people something they hadn’t seen before, seems odd that there was no new choreography in the show. I understand it’s hard when these songs are so classic, with videos so iconic, people don’t want to see an all new routine for “Thriller” etc. I admit, I too want to see these iconic moves, but there are songs such as “They Don’t Care About Us” that didn’t have a hugely choreographed dance sequence, which could have been reworked from the HIStory tour routine, but totally wasn’t. Oh and I could TOTALLY DO WITHOUT THE GIANT BLACK WIDOW SPIDER! Jesus christ, that was unnecessary.

I hate the orange pants. LOL I just hate orange. He looked good, though skinny, but healthy and completely able to perform. If he was in pain, as he said before, from knees or whatever, you couldn’t tell. He looked happy, and proud of the show he was going to put on. I don’t understand why he wore wigs out in the media, his real hair, curly and pulled back looked so much better. The dancers all looked so ridiculously excited to be part of the show, I feel bad they weren’t able to get to London, but happy they got the chance to at least work with him in planning it all.

Everyone who ever liked any MJ song should see this. Anyone who ever paid attention to him, even if just for the “freak show”, should see this. Any dancer or aspiring pop star should see this.

Now the depressing part…We shouldn’t be seeing this, we should have been seeing it for real in London. Blame can be laid upon many people, like the thisisnotit campaign claiming it’s AEG’s fault he died, to my personal belief that if the autopsy report says he was healthy, he shouldn’t have died, but he did because Conrad Murray gave him propofol. (goddamnit when is he going to be arrested?!?!). MJ had a drug problem, he had a doctor problem, he had a yes man problem. Yes, I think as thisisnotit does, that people should have stepped in at some point, but when was that point? Just now when he agreed to the shows and was overworked, or years ago when he started having a drug problem? This might have happened without preparing for a tour, or without AEG, as these doctors prescribing him anything were around regardless. It’s sad, but I am sure this is going to happen again to some other pop star (Britney? take notes dear). I don’t know how to fix this hollywood problem of doctors doing whatever celeb patients want, but it need to be fixed or we’ll lose more and more of our stars. In the end, ultimately this is where I think the blame lies…MJ wasn’t addicted to street drugs, he was addicted to things he could get (and did get) from his doctors like Arnold Klein. People gave MJ whatever he wanted, seemingly without a care. Someone should have cared.

I don’t know what else to say.

*edit* MJ wore an awesome long (thigh length) black coat with a black cross on the back at one point. want. want so bad!