border baby

sometimes i think it’s really fun that on a whim i can decide to go to canada for 2 minutes. cuz that’s what i did. go me. i decided to finally go to the duty free shop on the US side, that supposedly sell urban decay makeup. and they do. woo! bought 2 eye shadows. they’re stuff is much more shimmery than mac. i think it’s strange tho how it kills me to pay 4$ for an eyeshadow at the grocery store, but i don’t care about a 14$ eye shadow from a high end cosmetic company haha. anyway. next time i go however, i have to remember to park at the big ice cream cone and just walk, cuz when you take your car, you’re required to then go to canada. lol. so i went to canada, turned around and came back. the US guy gave me a hard time, that the duty free is for people who are going to canada. hey mr homeland security, technically i DID go to canada. and i got a 99 on that stupid test that you had to take to get your job, which i’m sure is more than you scored. so :P.

but yeah. urban decay makeup. adr2/bliss if you still want the eyeshadow primer potion that sets the shadow, they have it at the rainbow duty free. 12$. just don’t park in the lot, park at the ice cream cone haha.

i really think it’s unneccessary to have such strict customs things for people who live near canada. it’s clear i’m from here, and ppl from here go to canada all the time. if i want to go to canada so i can buy 2 eye shadows, i should be able to without being harassed. there’s just no need. maybe i should look into nexus.

almost had an aneurysm at work when they tried to reassign me to midibacc. i really had a fit. and so they didn’t move me. but i swear to god, that game is going to give me a stroke or something. just this one spot in my brain gets sharp shooting pains in it when it comes to having to deal that game.

tomorrow dinner with kate. and steph and merdith want to come see the townhouse to see if they want to try to rent here. and haircut FINALLY thursday.

high school was EIGHT YEARS AGO holy crap.

1) Where did you graduate from and what year?
North Tonawanda High School, 1998

2) Did you have school pride?
Not really. I just wasn’t involved with school. i painted the TNT window once. that window doesn’t even exist anymore and that makes me sad in a way.

3) Best Dance Ever?
I only went to 1 winter dance and 2 proms. i guess senior prom. i dunno. i don’t like dances. i just had mega cool hair and the best dress ever for senior prom.

4) Do you own all 4 Yearbooks?
yes i do. and they’ve been looked at so much (usually to make fun of people and update who has kids already) the binding is breaking.

5) What was the worst trouble you ever got into?
i didn’t get into any trouble. although i recently remembered that after i dropped french 4 someone reported to me that my french 4 teacher, and my previous french teacher were badmouthing me about it. so left both of them notes in their mailboxes saying that they should be more mature and shouldn’t talk about people etc. i was pissed lol.

6) What kind of people did you hang out with?
smart people LOL. i was in all advanced classes so i didn’t have much choice. that and the fact i have nothing in common with most people my age.

7) What was your number 1 choice of College in HS?
i only applied to state schools, i wanted to go to binghamton.

8) What radio station did you jam out to in highschool?
the edge, wblk for a period of 3 months in 10th grade. some canadian stations.

9) Were you involved in any organizations or clubs?
drama club for 1 semester until they stole all my props. foreign language honor society until i dropped french.

10) What were your favorite classes in High School?
AP US history, 12th grade english, calculus

11) Who was your big crush in High School?
scott rea. i can’t remember anyone else.

12) Would you say you’ve changed a lot since high school?
I still feel 15. i still look 15. haha

13) What do you miss the most about it?
angela. i don’t think i really liked high school. i was bored most of the time. i didn’t hate it, but i wouldn’t want to go back.

14) Your worst memory of HS?
psycho ex.

15) Did you have a car?
hah yeah right. luckily when i got my license 3 months before i turned 18, my mom had broken her ankle and so i got to use the car to drive to school every day.

16) What were your school colors?
Red and blue. Also, even though it’s not on here, our mascot was a lumberjacks.

17) Who were your favorite teachers?
afshani (us history), zayatz (12th grade english) hot!, um….guido was cool til he turned into a pervert. oo mr pearl. he rocked. 10th grade social studies.

18) Did you own a cell phone in highschool?
hahah no, no one did. ppl had pages towards the end of HS but that was it.

19) Did you leave campus for lunch?
no.

20) If so, where was your fav. place to go eat?
na

21) Were you always late to class?
never

22) Did you ever have to stay for Saturday School?
remember, i said i didnt do anything bad

23) Did you ever ditch?
again, no. i was a good student. i didn’t even leave early on vacation eves.

24) When it comes time for the reunion will you be there?
um…depends where i am in life. if i can sucessfully lie about what i’m doing with my life, probably. if i have a really hot boy, probably. i may go just to make fun of everyone (most likely lol)

25) Do you wish you were still in high school?
not particularly. except that i didn’t need a job at the time to pay for my amazingly high rent. hahahah

tonight was one of those nights that i wish i was a character in chuck palahniuk’s “lullaby”. i wish there really was a poem i could resite in my head that would kill people at will. because i would kill every single fucker who plays any form of baccarat. as soon as they walked in, they’d drop dead. they’d fall down dead in packs. and everyone would think, weird, i wonder why all these people are just dropping dead. and no one would ever know. until maybe people realized we had no bacc players anymore. that might set off flags. maybe i’d have to go to their restaurants and nail shops to do it. i’d only have to kill the ones that i don’t know where they work at the casino. and i’m not talking asians here. i’m talking asian, white, black, purple, australian, EVERYONE. kill all those fucking pieces of shit.

or i wish i was a witch and had spells where i could do horrible things to all of them. and make sure they were in a living hell. with no money to gamble with. i dunno, herpes or something. flesh eating bacteria.

someone once asked me if i rip my cuticles apart because i want to hurt myself. you know, instead of cutting, or punching myself in the face. and i don’t. i seriously honestly don’t. i can remember exactly when the habit started. but there is a certain amount of satisfaction when i can rip a chunk of skin off that’s been really bothering me. and sometimes it’s enough of a satisfaction that i stop doing it for a while. and i know i do it when i’m upset which explains why 3 of my fingers are bleeding right now.

i need a drink. or 12. oh wait, i can’t drink more than 3 drinks without ending up in the ER.

bowie

1. god bowie and iman are so hot
2. bowie with a gun so hot
3. the heart’s filthy lesson video so hot
4. i can’t find the bowie nazi picture.
5. new delirious layout. so go look. not bowie related, i swear.
6. ha this roseanne episode is the one where they find a box of doll heads in DJs room. that’s so something i would do and leave in an empty building haha.

dream

dreamed i was vangogh. ROCK! and for some reason i dreamed about bono and his oldest daughter.

went to dinner and the mall with leighanne. wanted to turn in my mac empties to get my free thing, but apparently i needed one more empty. so i had to buy another eyeshadow of course. also got red eyeshadow (which is the consistency of lipstick so i might have well just continued using lipstick on my eyes) at hot topic. went through the shit ass weather to jay’s to watch american idol and the ridiculous ice skating with the stars lol. punky remembers me now, which meant i got to read a bedtime story to her haha. i don’t know what to do with kids, it’s stressful.

still sick. bought dayquil but i’m not convinced it worked. i’m getting worse rather than better.

i guess we’re going to make winter trips to the ER an annual event. i spent last night there. i drank too much at the work holiday party: 3 glasses of wine. WTF it was hardly anything. totally forgot about my meds. so chalking it up to a bad reaction with the meds. but anyway. got sick, apparently the emt’s wouldn’t let mary just take me to her house, they made me ambulance it to the hospital. fan fucking tastic. woke up there and my parents were there. apparently tony had been there and stayed a while til my dad convinced him to leave haha. i hadn’t even seen tony at the party. crazy. sucks. i’m sure i’m the new talk of the casino now. we all have our time i guess.

before that, yesterday was good. jerry came over and had a nice time catching up on things. after he left, adr2 and bliss came over. watched, er rather tried to watch, the man who fell to earth with bowie. it was tough haha. very…out there…weird arty makes no sense so we fast forwarded alot of it kind of movie. the best part is when bowie is gonna shoot the girl and she covers her eyes with a banana. but yeah. it was worse than a david lynch film. won’t be one i’ll be seeing again any time soon – though apparently they are making a remake!?!?!?

the party before i was sick was fun. vegas is gonna be great. as long as i stay under 3 drinks 😛

and i’m sick on top of everything. woke up yesteday morning stuffed up and wicked sore throat.

ran into someone i hadn’t seen in a while. had quite an interesting, and long (over an hr) conversation. hahah.

hopefully will be meeting up with jerry tomorrow somewhere. it’s been long over due. and nin tix onsale at 10.

ADR let me know what times are good for airport pick up. i sent emails to your school account i think. need to book my flight.

horrorscope

Are you fully aware of how lucky you are? There are some amazing people in your life who have been guiding forces and inspirations on your path. In fact, some of the most difficult ones have taught you the most.

holy mother of good luck. trent will be in vegas on april 1st, so that settles when i’ll be going to visit adr!!! she had wanted a show she could go to, and it’s just the most perfect timing ever. that’s when i was figuring to go anyway! yaaaaaaaaaay!!!!! i’ll look into flights soon. half the ppl from work already have theirs. i’ll talk to them tonight.