Author Archives: Elegant

i haven’t done this in a while – fun with email – “horse cum covered sluts”….that might just be the best one ever.

so…went shopping with adr last night. we went to look at furniture at the big lots furniture place. there was some nice stuff, but we can’t really buy anything til we know for sure we have the place, and see how much room we have. went to walmart, ended up buying fabric for pillows. we bought black pleather for the cube pillow she’s making (those big giant square footrest type pillows that sell for 50$+ at trendy stores and target)…and this black fabric that says “sweet and vicious” in white all over it for a smaller pillow – since it seemed so “me”…:P

mom said she wants a new kitchen table, so now i gotta bring that up every day. cuz that means we get the old glass one which i love so much lol. it would rock so hard to have that table.

adr’s mom finished altering my shirt. it fits now, yay! it’s nice and tight and woohoo. i hope it’s decent weather on saturday for the show.

tomorrow is graduation lol. we get our certificates, and i keep saying “yay certificates i’ll actually use unlike my degree” lol. apparently, pit bosses have to have a 4 year degree. but i’m not sure how true that is. it’s listed as a prereq in the casinos job listing book, but i figure they probably look at experience more than anything else. i’ll have to ask around, to my pit boss friends.

the wardrobe people lost my new uniform. they don’t have my sheet i had to fill out, and my name isn’t on their list anymore. the lady remembers that she altered my vest for me, but can’t find it blahblahblah. she’s supposed to call sometime this week when she finds it. or to go in and get altered again.

and apparently my dad didn’t put the new processor in last night – just the video card jeff gave me. which explains why the game still runs slow as shit. he’s going to do it tomorrow when i’m at work. i’m gonna burn shit off my drive incase things go wrong and i have to start from scratch. lol. i totally want a new monitor. it’s going on my birthday list. preferrably flat screen. and preferrably bigger than my current monitor, which is like…a dwarf haha.

i knew my mom was wrong when she said my meds were MAOIs…they’re not. they’re tricyclics, just like i thought. so i can take cough medicine et al. which is good, cuz this illness is definitely moving into my lungs. john is sick now too, he’s blaming me. he calls me at work and goes “i am so mad at you!!” lol.

i guess dad is putting in the new processor tomorrow. i’m going to class….buuuuut probably not taking my audition lol. i didn’t study this weekend like i said i was going to, cuz of this whole everquest/computer stuff, and you know…sleeping.

might be getting together with ty and heather tomorrow but dunno. tues i definitely have to run errands, get my meds, call the apartment guy if 1. i have a voice, and 2. adrienne doesn’t call tomorrow.

i got like no sleep last night. went to bed at 3:30, was still awake at 5:30 because every time i started to fall asleep i started coughing up a lung, or i had to pee. restless sleep with more weird dreams about john…he was a teacher (again) and our class was going to get tested for sars…in an abanonded old house that i always wanted to explore because it had been a sanitarium. and i think we were a couple. and then something about chinese owning the house/sanitarium and cement blocking up the doors and windows so no one could get in anymore. and something about driving in snow. and college.

not meeting ty and heather cuz they don’t want to catch my illness. wouldn’t it be ironic if i had sars?…parents fly in and out of toronto, get brochures from the CDC to give to their dr about sars…ty and heather are in/near toronto…but i’m the one who gets sars. haha.

and i forgot how much i like stabbing westward. it was unsafe to listen to them the past few months, but things are good now lol. wish i could have seen them before they broke up. and it still amuses me that “ungod” and filter’s “hey man nice shot” are the same song. and i still think “jesus christ get over it already” when i listen to them…since chris has been singing about the same girl who fucked him over for 4 albums lol.

remember all those years when i didn’t like korn? i remember why. psycho liked korn, and that’s when life is peachy came out. i remember him and aaron playing it for me, and me thinking “if you’re going to listen to music with droning guitars and background noise, listen to manson cuz he’s so much better, and the songs are so much more interesting”…and i’m still right…cuz it was life is peachy, and life is peachy sucks. who likes this album?? adidas is the only saving grace…and maybe twist, cuz it’s funny. unfortunately, i can picture psycho “singing” twist, and yeah…scared of him, don’t like it. and i can piture aaron singing adidas (of course he’d get a big kick out of that song). die life is peachy die.

hey guess what. i took my audition today afterall lol

and hey guess what… i got a 40 out of 50 on it – the first excellent score he’s given out

and hey guess what…friday is my last day in my department!! now we just need to be able to have my tues/wed off to go to cleveland, which should be no problem, since those were the days i requested off anyway. gotta talk to scheduling tomorrow to see if i’ll be starting monday, or thursday.

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

and my comp is put together, and apparently working. lol

i’ve been welcomed to the “swing shift losers who go home and play everquest all night after work” clique last night. went to jenn and jeff’s to get a crash course in the game, got home at 6:30 lol. i have to go to walmart now and buy it, so they can come over and set it up on my comp for me. and i figure i can get my mom something for mothers day while i’m at it.

i have no voice…still. it got really bad last night after work. everyone is like… “what happened to your voice?”…what do you think happened? i’m sick obviously…no i swallowed razor blades so i sound this way on purpose. haha tony made a crack that maybe it’ll stay, and i’ll have one of those ruff gravely voices that guys think sound sexy, so that when i start dealing i can use it to get more tips lol.

well this whole everquest thing is ending up being more expensive than i had planned for. but i guess it’s improving my comp, which needed improvements anyway. bought 3 new memory cards(?), getting a better video card from jeff (we already put in a new card today from my moms comp, cuz my card wasn’t 3d, but its an old 3d card), and dad is gonna put in the new processor for me.

but must stop buying stuff now!

hmmm well….tonight didn’t go entirely as planned.

i have absolutely no voice. ok well i have a voice, but it’s completely shot. i had to train the new girl today, which involved alot of talking etc. yeah…voice…is dead. apparently john thought it was sexy. he came and sat with me and jenn on break, and when he asked me where i was, and i was like “what?” with no voice he was completely startled and was like “say my name.” lol. he’s like “you ARE going to the bar tonight, right?” lol. so yeah…

went to the bar with jenn when we got out. had like…1 and a half beers…by then its like 4:30 and someone said the cops had been called. so me and jenn booked out, and were hanging outside. jeff had come in, said he was pissed off and left…so jenn was all wondering wtf was going on. john hadn’t shown up…so we just left. gonna have to have words with that man tomorrow. but i got a free drink token for next time, from patrick. can’t wait to be out of my house so i can spontaneously decide to go out and not come home til 8am.

so i’m home earlier than i was anticipating. my mom is awake for some reason…i’m gonna have to pee soon so she’ll know i’m half drunk, but still drove home (i’m not really drunk…1 and a half beers, give me some credit lol).

holy shit i have such a beer headache. my god. it’s cuz i didn’t drink enough. my drinking was interrupted. blah. took my drugs, work already u stupid drugs. and i don’t know what it is about me drinking and not sleeping. anyone else gets wasted and falls asleep, but nooo not me. takes me forever still to fall asleep, then i wake up 3 hours later. i forced myself not to get out of bed at 8am like the last time.

did i mention the twin label on my bottle of canadian said “it’s over”…jenn and i wondered if that was a sign lol. but theennnn he didn’t show up. ah well. whatever.

i haven’t spoken yet to know if i have a voice today or not.

oh yeah, everyone (aka jenn jeff john others) are trying to get me to play everquest with them. lol. john told me to be a dark elf. whatever that means.

i have seriously never lost my voice this bad before. i never really lost my voice at all before. it might sound lower and stratchy, but not like this. i seriously cannot get through a sentence without my voice going out. tonight is going to be a long night – continue to train the new girl, confront john about ditching last night, blahblahblah. it’s jenn’s last supervisor shift tonight, i’m sure she’ll be hanging out with me and the new girl all night. i’ll have to go see the EMTs again for cough drops. they made me sign the seen patient list just to give me 5 cough drops lol.

i gotta remember to get my car inspected next month. my registration came yesterday so we’re all good on that. gotta get some insurance quotes now for when i move out. ug that’s gonna be killer. i think i’ll take a defensive driving course (6 hours) to get the 10% discount on insurance.

ug. i really hate the mindset i get into at the casino. i get there, and get caught up in the big circus of it all, and i get so fucking hostile. if any little thing is irritating/upsetting/whatever i get all over dramatic and…just hostile. i want to break shit. all the drama and bullshit – and i’m not talking about my own situation…just all of it. everyone is involved in some kind of bullshit.

so i start crying at work today, cuz i was just so hostile and hating. i was the breaker, and i’m sitting alone in pit 3 thinking about all this shit going around in my head, and next thing i know i’m crying. super.

i’m not coming home tomorrow night. going to after hours after work for jenn’s “hooray-you-got-to-leave-the-department” party…it has the makings for an interesting night once again, possibly involving sobering up at *someone’s* house, but i’m not getting my hopes up too high about that one.

and the parents are home. i haven’t even seen them yet and they’re irritating me. i so need my own place, and soon. cuz i really need to like, blast the “broken” cd from my stereo really loud right now, but no. i cant. cuz they’re home again…i can’t fuck around and be noisy and watch tv or anything, cuz yeah, they’re sleeping. ug.

and they’re totally gonna end up seeing my tattoo. i forget it’s there, and i’ll do something dumb and they’ll see it like my mom saw my bellybutton ring accidentally cuz i forgot it was there…

and i’m getting sick. throat has been tickled all night, been coughing all night…ug. maybe i have sars and i’ll die.

mom is all super excited about the apartment and ways we can decorate cheaply etc etc etc. bought a table at the rerun furniture shop in downtown NT. it was 15bux and cool and modern. wood tho, so we have to paint it. all good. we went and drove by the apartment that we hope to get.

i’m totally anxious about the tattoo thing. i just want to tell her i got it, cuz i’m being paranoid about her seeing it. oh well hahah.

told her i’m not coming home tonight. she said “don’t get arrested” lol.

well considering it’s 1am, i’m assuming john’s not making it over today. eh, whatever. *whispers* probably for the better *wink*…kept me out of trouble.

so instead, i redesigned the site. now i just gotta make sure it all works. now the question is, why don’t my glowing links work in the blog, but work everywhere else…and why do i still have a goddamn horizontal scroll bar?

and i’ve been listening to korn all night. i don’t like life is peachy…with the exception of “adidas” lol. i need to acquire self titled at some point. gotta learn it all before ozzfest. so excited.

it’s thundering out.

and woo hoo, go ottawa! eastern conference finals!!

gross gross gross gross gross gross there is a dead semi mutliated bird in my garage. i have to touch it to throw it out. it looks like a sort of baby bird, or just maybe that mutliated. stupid cat. i don’t think i can get away with leaving it there til my parents get home. gross gross gross.

must.stop.spending.so.much.money. but this time my excuse is that it’s all for the apartment. i bought a black metal cd/dvd rack from linens and things for 30 bux…bought a phone/answering machine from walmart for 30 bux…adr and i both bought 2 martha stewart martini/cocktail glasses from kmart for a whole 3.50 lol…um…i bought this monopoly-esque game called “The 70s” from salvation army. why? i don’t fucking know.

we went to kmart to check out the black metal table they had in the sale paper…yeah so glad there was a floor display, because it has fake wood veneer on it, and it was bubbled…yeah. wouldn’t have been happy with that. ended up finding a white metal table for the same price at walmart – still fake wood veneer, but…it’s better than the kmart one, cuz it has seat cusions, instead of the bubbled fake wood. if we buy it we just have to paint it black. gonna see what the mom thinks of it when they return tomorrow with the wagon. they also had a wooden table that is a possibility too. they’re all 100 bux.

there was also this metal end table, with 2 glass shelves at salvation army for 10 bux that we sorta want….to paint black of course. and there was this black leather 70s ish chair at amvets that i was really interested in, except it was slightly broken, and i don’t know if it is fixable, and there was no price.

adrienne’s mom is altering my corset shirt, yay!! it’s gonna have a zipper in the back now, so it’ll be easy to get on and off, and tight. woo hoo.

woah, elton john and that other guy he works with, are scoring music for a broadway adaptation of Anne Rice’s Vampire Chronicals. so need to see that!

and that’s it. parents return tomorrow.

for anyone who watches the osbournes, and was wondering what Kelly’s boyfriend’s nickname is (since MTV bleeped it so well)…it’s cauliflower dick.

and it’s just so much funnier to hear ozzy swearing at the ocean when you can actually hear him swearing.

worked for only 4 hours today. came home and hung out on the comp. john is coming sometime later tomorrow for the hedge trimmer. once again, dunno if i’ll take my blackjack audition tomorrow – was gonna study over the weekend, but that didn’t happen.

i want a vintage/retro formica table for the apartment. preferably with chairs included, but not necessary i suppose. too bad i ruined the one we have in the basement when i was a kid…

um…something else but i don’t remember. i’m gonna smack shawn around if he continues with his comments about my “boyfriend” at work. lol

working on a redesign, but dunno if i’ll ever finish it or not…

haha what do you know, i didn’t audition today. i really don’t want to audition at all now. cuz i’m so much better at roulette than blackjack, and blackjack is so boring, and ug. the guy who is running the class keeps calling me “john’s protege” lol.

lacuna coil = italian goth-rock band, chick singer, male sometimes vocalist. similar to evanescence but better. if you’re interested in checking them out i suggest: “unspoken”…”heaven’s a lie”…”entwined”…”no need to explain”…”angel’s punishment”…”falling”… heather – if you want to go to the show with me, that’d be rad. i’ll pay, it’ll be a birthday gift. may 17th, a saturday – it’ll be a good time.

the drugs = barbituate pain killers…and loopy, as in really tired and floaty. aka high.

the person who writes the horoscopes for the buffalo news must be stalking me. cuz i swear to god it was written for me:
“you may be tempted to do something that is secretive. if you do be prepared to deal with the consequences. you will not be able to avoid rumors. tread carefully today”
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

soooooooooo yeah hahah. looked through the sale ads and classifieds for a kitchen set. there’s one i’m going to call from the paper, but…50$ for a 5 piece dining room set with a leaf…seems too good to be true. there is a set on sale at kmart for 100$ that i sorta like, so maybe i’ll just go buy it and be done with it. salvation army was closed today so i couldn’t go look there.

i really need to stop spending money like it’s water. at least i have a bunch more coming to me for the ozzfest tix, and stuff i sold. cuz i continuously find things to buy. it’s very manic of me. i bought a metropolis movie poster for our apartment…my bad.

so on that note, dvds i want:
the breakfast club
forrest gump
jurrasic park
metropolis (new restored version)
can’t think of any of the others…

and i so totally love vegas. and i love the travel channel. and i love the travel channel shows on vegas.

lol john told me to download this song “surf medley” by junior brown – this country singer…haha it’s great. it’s just instrumental of different songs, hense medley, but it’s so fun. he said it’s the best surf song anywhere, and that’s coming from a kid who grew up on the beach. part of it is “Secret Agent Man” (which was what spurred on the conversation last night – the band was playing it). fabulous.

well…we got our first choice of apartments. they called and left a message on my machine, then called adr who left a message on my machine. i still want to take a look at the place that called us back tonight – it’s cheaper, and who knows, it might be super big and nice. and i need my parents to be home before signing anything and all that stuff.

work changed the music genre again – now it’s “modern rock”…when i was eating dinner before my shift, evanescence came on… then papa roach…later heard some metallica, olp, i think tool, evanescence again…soundgarden…yeah. i can deal with that.

the lacuna coil show on the 17th is 15$. someone go with me.

gaaaah so happy we went and looked at the apartment today, cuz it’s now our first choice. it was huge. the big bedroom is bigger than my room now, with a normal closet and a walk in closet. the smaller room is still decently sized, maybe the size of my room now but i think it’s a bit smaller, with a normal closet. bathroom is bathroom, kitchen was pretty big, big eating area, adr said lots of cupboards and counter space, fridge, dishwasher, air conditioning. the living room was huge, and sliding doors onto a balcony. and it’s cheaper than our previous 1st choice.

the only problem that may come up is that there are people in there right now, in the process of moving out – but they’re building a house and i guess there are problems so they don’t have a moveout date. the landlord said they’ll be out by the end of may at the latest, but that doesn’t give him enough time to get in there to paint, replace the carpets, anything else he has to do so that we could move in by june 1st. we said it didn’t matter, that if its the first, that’s fine, if it’s the 15th, thats fine, if it’s the end of june that’s fine. it’s not like we’re in an apt now and the lease is running out so we have to find a place right away. he said he’d call next week with more info. it’s 490$ a month, and includes water. the woman who lives there now was there, and she said the gas and electric weren’t too bad – but they were also paying in an installment plan, so she wasn’t sure what the real rates were. i looked at my parents bills, and we figured out from them what our costs would be. we’d both end up paying around 377$ a month with all the bills and rent – rent, electric, gas, local phone, cable, internet…i think that was it. and basing my pay on a 15$ an hour rate once i start dealing, i still get 900$ to spend on everything else we’d need, like food, my car, etc. we told him this was our first choice, so hopefully things will work out. he said there was another interested party but they were short term renters, and he hasn’t heard back from them. so cross your fingers that we can get this one.

we went through and made a list of stuff we have and stuff we need. the biggest thing we need is a kitchen table set. minor stuff includes bar supplies (lol), toaster, random other things. so i’m gonna look in the classifieds and stuff for a table, check salvation army etc. getting excited now. haha the guy asked us if we were partiers, we’re like no lol. i work nights, when can i throw a party? on a tuesday night? right.

gotta find something for dinner now, and get ready for work.