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work was boring. i was in an “Eh” kind of mood most of the day, and the ppl i worked with were less than talkative. so i was as well. it was such a nice day out, i wandered around a bit outside “handing out coupons” to people. that’s in quotations, because i was supposed to be doing that, but very few people walked by me so i probably only handed out about 10.

i work 3 – close tomorrow. no way would i be able to find someone who would switch shifts with me, so if someone doesn’t get off danielle’s phone, i won’t see her again until october. tomorrow shouldn’t be too bad, i work with good people. i’ll be first cut, so maybe if i get out way early i can still go out with them tomorrow night. blah. don’t want to think about it.

realized today that my car is under warantee for 3 years… not 1. i have no idea why i thought it was only 1 year. and that means i have the roadside assistance for 2 more years too…which is good, cuz now i don’t have to re-buy AAA. i should send in for my maps before it expires on the 18th. what do i want maps of?

i have nothing else to say. if we get ahold of danielle tonight, i guess one of the plans is to go to the erie county fair. it starts today, so it’s cheap night. which is good cuz the only money i have is the 5$ i borrowed from my mom this morning incase i had to pay for parking at work. i cannot spend any more money, because when ty and heather come back down monday to do the tourist thing in the falls, i’m going to have to spend tons. i have to pay my credit card and health insurance this week.

spirit airlines is offering free flights on sept 11th. i wonder if they fly out of buffalo… i don’t think they do. but i’d go someplace if it was free lol.

Posted in: Personal

August 2002 Dreams

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August 2, 2002

i had gotten a dog. it was a big bull dog. it was really cute, and i actually liked it. then i got a 2nd dog. i was taking them for a walk. i think the 2nd dog was a beagle. for some reason i had to stop, and my dogs were already well trained and listened to me. then we walked passed other people walking a dog, and it was a giant mastiff dog. so i was sorta scared cuz the dog was so gigantic. then my dogs were licking my face.
from dreaming@swoon.com: As a general rule dogs in a dream are a good omen and symbolize friends. Of course the interpretation varies according to the action and other details but is fairly straight-forward. If the dog was friendly and affectionate, it signifies pleasure and happy times with friends; If the dog in your dream was an exceptionally large one, it signifies protection through a powerful friend.

Posted in: Dreams \ Tagged:

David Bowie @ Area 2

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back.

sunday: worked til 6. it was fun. i don’t remember why but things at work have been pretty good lately. i worked with cool people. i think that was why. i was in my car leaving for toronto at exactly 6, and i pulled into carolyn’s driveway at exactly 7:30. go me. and i even got lost too. because if you take the bayview south exit, you can’t go north like carolyn said. but you can take the bayview north exit 😛 now i know. once i got to carolyn’s we went to eat at the usual pub place. had awful service, left virtually no tip lol. then back to carolyn’s house. we watched the u2 specials she taped for me, which was rad. and then watched this old episode of 90210 that happened to be on the tape. that led to the major revelation of the day…..i know i’ve mentioned ultra hot server, and i think i mentioned that i couldn’t figure out who he reminded me of….figured it out….he looks exactly like Brian Austin Green (david from 90120)…so from now on, ultra hot server is known as david lol. anyway. so i was falling asleep all night cuz i was dead tired from work and then driving, so after watching half of Batman Forever on TNN, went to bed.

monday: woke up around 11 i think. got ready to go to Area 2. we decided that we didn’t want to spend from 2:30 to whenever bowie was on at the ampitheatre if you couldn’t bring in food or drink. so instead we bummed around downtown toronto for a while, hit a few cd stores, eaton center etc. had lunch at Zelda’s which is in the gayborhood, and owned by a drag queen. it was a fun place. there was this weird lady sitting next to us, and she wouldn’t leave. lol. eventually we made our way to the ampitheatre, i think around 5. ended up catching half of Ash’s set, and all of Blue Man Group. yeah…blue man group…does not translate to the concert stage. if that was the only time you were going to see them, it’s not worth it. they are so much better in the theatre. on a concert stage they had to make it more musical, they had a band, and just did alot of music stuff. in the theatre they were completely wacked out lol. so not impressed with their performance there. then david bowie came on. we were like ?!?! it’s still light out, it was like 7pm, and he was on already? what happened to Busta Rhymes? well apparently Busta wasn’t allowed over the border LOL. so bowie went on early, and played a longer set compared to the setlists that have been posted on davidbowie.com. BOWIE ROCKED. it was so good. he was so adorable. he talked alot between songs, was really funny, and he has a super accent. highlight was probably “i’m afraid of americans” and not just cuz of the trent thing… it was really good, and the crowd went nuts for it. “china girl” was good, so was “let’s dance” …it was all good. at one point he borrowed sunglasses from some girl up front, cuz the sun was shining in his bad eye LOL. it was just really great. bowie is great. so then we left. LOL. didn’t even bother to stay for even 1 moby song. soooo many people left after bowie too it was crazy. poor moby lol. so back at carolyn’s we ended up watching the end of batman forever, which was on a different station but happened to be at the part where we had turned it off the night before. weird. oh yeah, i ran into trish, from high school, at area 2. haven’t seen her in 3 years or so. talked to her for a few minutes, she seems to be doing pretty good.

bowie setlist from davidbowie.com
Life on Mars?
Ashes to Ashes
Breaking Glass
Cactus
Slip Away
China Girl
Be My Wife
Fame
I’ve Been Waiting For You
I Would Be Your Slave
I’m Afraid of Americans
Stay
5:15 The Angels Have Gone
“Heroes”
Heathen (The Rays)

Hallo Spaceboy
Fashion
Everyone Says Hi
Let’s Dance
Ziggy Stardust

tuesday: left carolyn’s at 12 and made my way to oakville to heather’s house. she followed me back to my house, where we hung about for a while until we had to go to the airport. went to the airport, picked up Ty, and headed for dinner…where else… hard rock. 2 reasons. my discount and the fact that it’s next to the rainbow bridge so they could hop right over back to canada, without me needing to give them directions from my house. so good time there of course. they’ll be back down monday to do the falls tourist stuff, cuz Ty has never been to NY before. and now i’m home.

my car will hit 10,000 miles by the end of the week, a little over a year and a month since i got the car. not bad. hehe. i work the next 5 days in a row (i’m going to die)…i totally forgot danielle is leaving friday. we have to do something tomorrow cuz it’s the only day i don’t work at night. blah. i was going to see if i could get out early on saturday so i could go to brooke’s housewarming party, but i dunno. i’m going to see if someone will switch shifts with me on thursday so i can go out with danielle on her last day here. my schedule sucks.

Posted in: Concerts, Other bands \ Tagged: ,

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some things i forgot about today. this old guy came up to me and jack and started talking to us about…i’m not sure what. just anything. he had been in the marines and was telling us about traveling. then he whips out his wallet and is like, i’m just going to show you this (me, not jack) and it’s 2 old pictures of him from the marines, one with his uniform on, one shirtless showing off his muscles (and he was built). he showed jack anyway. then he starts talking about vermont somehow with jack, who apparently skis. then the guy is like, you should come up and visit vermont, and you can bring her with you (me). jack is like ok?!? we exchange looks. and the guy asks me if i was married, as if it would be bad for me to go on a ski trip with jack if i was married. so i’m like no, i’m only 22. then he starts saying something to me about not getting any tattoos cuz tattoos are gross, and how he only has one from 1949 when his dad died, he didn’t even have a marines tattoo. me and jack keep looking at eachother like wtf is going on haha it was weird.

so yeah. my current phase in my evolution of emotion is the “eh” stage. i’m at the point where i really don’t care if anything happens between me and nick. there are a few reasons behind it…he’s leaving soon, he’s a big flirt so it’s hard to really tell if he’s interested, it’s just..hmm i dunno. he’s a really great guy, and i wouldn’t be adverse to anything happen. but i’m not going to really actively persue anything…i am at the point where i’d be cool with just being friends and hanging out, and if something happened, well whatever. i think there is potential for me to get down on things if we were to get together, and then have him leave for 2 years. and it’s not like he’d be close by and visitable…i’m pretty content with things at the moment. of course that could change in a snap but for now…i’m ok with this.

working 11:30-6 and leaving from work to toronto. bowie is monday, coming home tuesday. stopping to get heather on my way home tuesday, so she can follow me back to buffalo. she’s gotta pick ty up at the airport tuesday night, so we’re gonna hang out before then, pick him up, maybe get some dinner. then i managed to get next monday off (the 12th) so they can come down and we can do the tourist stuff – maid of the mist, cave of the winds (which i’ve never done)…maybe the balloon if ty wants to. we’ll see. probably go to hard rock – that discount is too good to pass up lol. knowing me i’ll probably blog from carolyn’s. but if not, i’ll be around tuesday night.

i think when i get back i’m going to implement a new feature…i think i’m going to have special password posts sometimes. when i do it, i’ll mention it so that if you are privledged i can set up passwords for people who want them. i’m just really paranoid about people from work finding my site and seeing alot of this lately. ok just one person i’m paranoid about lol.

Posted in: Personal

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must go to sleep. very late. must get up early. but.

work was good. it was pretty busy for a while, since it was friday night. and i was wrong and i didn’t have to stay til close, but i pretty much did anyway. i got out a bit after 12, then went to my car and nick’s car to get clothes, then back to work to change, and waited for him to get out. went to the bar, chilled there for a few hours, and home now. it was a good night. more tomorrow when i have time to talk.

amy might call at the ungodly hour of 8 am to wake me up to go to breakfast. she’s in town to see danielle before she goes to indiana, and since i worked tonight, wanted to go for breakfast. i work at 11. i really hope she doesn’t call. lol it’s late. i’m tired. i have to get up at 9:30 as it is….ug. i’m going to be dead at work tomorrow.

and next weeks schedule SUCKS

 

1. totally using fake names for people i work with. they’ll be in italics. so far nick = new kid.

2. last night. last night was eh for most of the night, even tho i was working with nick, manda, and kate who are pretty fun. i felt blah all day thinking about shit, and it seemed like the feeling was more than mutual. nick had said he felt under the weather at preshift, and then manda and kate were irritated from the afternoon. people were being idoits and shit, just annoying. things got better tho. adr and danielle came in, so talked to them for a bit cuz they sat up front. and we all got in better moods so it was cool. like i said last night, i left at 12, but stuck around til nick got out and went to the bar. that’s about it. yeah. i have more to say, sorta, about things, but no time right now.

3. today. it was actually really good today. nick ended up switching shifts with pot smoker (who we’ll call jack). things were good tho. jack actually talks to me now. i was a suggestive selling whore lol. we were told if we suggestive sold the special glasses to every table we sat we could get free retail merchandise when we left. we only had to give them the little pamphlet thing, but i gave them this big long sales pitch lol. “have you guys ever been to the toronto hard rock? well let me tell you, this one is WAY better. and we’re having a contest right now across the nation that whichever hard rock sells the most of these special collectors glasses, they win a big prize. the only two stores that are even close to winning is this store and toronto. the glasses are 2 dollars extra if you buy a drink and you can take it home as a souvenier, or you can by them seperately. you can get any kind of drink you want in them. so let your server know if you’re interested and they’ll hook it up for you. it’d be really great if you could buy a glass or two and help us out in the contest.” haha i’m so great. so i got the blue hoodie sweatshirt we just got in a few weeks ago. i’d probably have ended up buying it so… all good. i had fun. hahah. i don’t know how many glasses we sold but i don’t really care. i swear that for about an hour every table i took to be sat something was wrong. people stole their chairs, they were really 6 not 5, etc etc etc. actually it was only when i sat people in the back room. so i was running around for a while, but it was cool. i guess there was hard rock drama last night at the bar, but i was pretty oblivious. this wasn’t told to me, but jack was talking to someone else about last night (he was at the bar too), he took this girl from work out, and i guess she was basically like “have a nice life” so now he all hates her, and it’s a big thing. i dunno. but it’s sorta funny. i guess. not really. haha i’d be miserable if it happened to me haha.

4. my dad’s latest job idea for me is to work as a car saleswoman for Saturn. because they do things differently and don’t want to hire people with sales backgrounds. a few days ago they wanted me to be a pharmaceutical saleswoman, even tho they told me i’d suck at it a few months ago when i mentioned i was going to look into it. oh, and my dad said i should try to get a job doing airport security because they have a shortage of female workers.

yeah ok starving. all i had to eat since 3pm yesterday was a sandwich at work last night, yogurt and a cinnamon bun this morning. going out to eat with adr now. more later.

Posted in: Personal

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1. What is your lineage? Where are your ancestors from? dad’s side: germany, yugoslavia. mom’s side: poland, italy
2. Of those countries, which would you most like to visit? germany. big time.
3. Which would you least like to visit? Why? yugoslavia… it sorta doesn’t exist anymore lol. my grandma was still german, just born in yugoslavia or something. so it doesn’t count.
4. Do you do anything during the year to celebrate or recognize your heritage? not really. my dad’s sister makes this gross german cake for christmas every year…and i don’t eat it. and then we were going to do the annual christmas shot of jager in honor of their father (my grandfather) who died within the last few years (i forget when)…but i think we skipped last christmas…
5. Who were the first ancestors to move to your present country (parents, grandparents, etc)? my dad. he’s an immigrant. he was born in germany, near the border of east and west germany. his family came over here when he was 4. my grandpa had been over before WWII but went back to germany during the depression, and was drafted into Hitler’s army…i just found out yesterday that my aunt had been in an orphanege. my grandma was trying to escape from yugoslavia with my aunt, who was 2, and she was pregnant with my other aunt. apparently, my grandma had to go into the hospital along the way, and gave my aunt to some family member to take care of. while she was in the hospital the russians came and took over half the town – and just like a movie, my grandma was on the non occupied side of town. so when she had my aunt, and got out of the hospital she would go ask the russians to let her get her other child and they kept saying no. finally they said yes, so my grandma ran up some big hill with the stroller to the family’s house. they told her they didn’t think she was coming back, so they gave my aunt to an orphanege. so then my grandma had to find the orphanege. when she did, my aunt didn’t remember who she was and didn’t want to go with her – but my grandma made her haha. interesting eh?

anyway. i feel kinda blah today. it’s too hot. i slept but not very good. i talked to joe last night after i got back from danielle’s. haven’t talked to him in forever so that was cool. he has a photo for me of a guitar in the toronto skydome hard rock cafe signed by trent AND bowie hehe.

i work til close tonight. and i have this large feeling i’m going to be the one to actually have to stay until 1am. the girl in charge tonight is coming in 3 hours early for her shift, so she should be the first to leave. then of me and new kid, they’ll probably make me stay to close. i’m kinda torn about whether i want to stay til close or not…i might want to go to the bar again after work…if they let me leave early i’m not about to drive back to the falls to go to the bar. but i hate staying til 1, and that means walking by myself at night in the falls….ug. stupid later closing shifts on weekends. maybe i can argue that the new kid needs another day training on close and i can make him stay with me lol.

i hate my self imposed rules to not mention names of people i’m not good friends with on my blog anymore. you know how confusing it is. i’m sure you do, if you read this at all lol. i should make up code names or something.

the weather report is funny. high 83, currently 86. cold front moving in. yeah. feels so cold. and tomorrow is supposed to be 83 too. yeah. cold front.

Posted in: Personal \ Tagged:

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soooo yesterday. carolyn and i went to fridays, since she’s been craving it since we were in new orleans. walked around the mall, and blockbuster. killed a whole 2 hrs :P. the rest of the day was spent watching popmart and searching for simpsons wav files. lol. after dinner, got eric and adrienne and did nothing. really drove around aimlessly, ended up walking at the river, and then dennys. we got there before 10pm which hasn’t happened in years, so we got that grand slam special. highlight of the night :P.

today…it’s supposed to be near 90 ug. we’re going to hard rock for lunch with adr, since i get a discount lol. and then……it sucks that there is nothing to do around here.

 

my last day off….went to hard rock 🙂 we ALMOST got rained on. sky got all dark the closer we got to the falls, then it was sprinkling when we were walking from “my parking space” to the restaurant. it rained while we were inside, so at least that was good. i made them do the YMCA so i could laff at everyone working today, and i wouldn’t feel bad for not participating hahaha. adrienne took advantage of my discount and bought the blue hoodie. then we drove around looking for things to waste the rest of the 14 pictures left on my disposable camera so i could finally get it developed (my mom bought it back before my vacations for me). since carolyn is a “tourist” she had an excuse to take pics at my work hehe.

Posted in: Personal

July 2002 Dreams

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July 18, 2002

i was one of those big talking M&Ms on the commercials. don’t remember much except i was trying to teleport myself to an amusement park made of legos. i guess i managed to teleport myself someplace, and i was living in a cardboard box. i think i was in hiding from something. and i think the amusement park was a circus, cuz one of the circus performers found me in my box. she was in love with me. i was a boy m&m.
posted by sara @ 12:25 PM//

July 3, 2002

it was valentines day, and my boyfriend was coming over to take me out. it was trent. i guess it was prom too, and we were teenagers. so we went to prom, which was outdoors someplace. he wanted to go walk in the woods, but i didn’t want to. so instead we went over to this higher part to look down upon the forest. the forest was all creepy because it was covered in fog. because it was all creepy we decided to go walk in the forest anyway. then it turned into me being at a mall with carolyn and other friends, and we went to the lower level. then i realized that the mall had been built over where the forest was. so i was really sad, because i had gone there to reminise about the good old days and it had been paved over, and a mall was built. there was a casino in the mall too, which had been built on some other important thing of my past.
i was in rochester with eric. the highway we were on was built over a body of water, and it was so low to the water level you felt like you were on the water. then i realized the road actually was covered in water too. then we got to geneseo, which was all on water too, and there was a big building there, with colored water falling down the walls. so i was like wtf is that, and we went to check it out. to get to the building you had to walk on water covered walkways, so i was like no way. but eric went, and he said it was a casino, and that we had been there before. i was like no we haven’t. he said we had, but before it was finished being built. then we went inside, because the whole reason i wanted to see it was because it had a margarita bar inside. so we went inside, and there was a display case with dolls in it. they were electronic barbies, that would move and talk. there were 3 of them, but i only remember 1. it was pop mart tour bono.
posted by sara @ 12:08 PM//

July 1, 2002

something about snakes. i was super scared of them. i was at some sort of camp thing, taking a sculpture class with the woman i had in 10th grade, but dropped her class (drawing and painting) because i hated it. she had gotten married and had a different name. kristin o. my friend in high school was in it, so was angela. i remembered that last semester i had signed up for a watercolors class but could never find the room so i forgot to go to it. but i didnt get a failing grade, or anything. then the part about snakes.

Posted in: Dreams \ Tagged:

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day off today, what did i do. went to hard rock lol. my mom wanted to go get a shirt, so we went down there. day off wednesday, what am i going to do? go to hard rock for lunch with adr and carolyn lol. i’ll try to stay away tomorrow haha.

anyway, it’s so friggen humid. it feels like new orleans did. ug. now i have nothing else to do today. prolly do something later with adr and eric. maybe something with AC. it’s supposed to storm real bad soon. it said, severe storms developing in the afternoon blah blah blah. afternoon is almost over so..

 

i forgot to post this before.

background: in 3rd grade i was picked to be in MPP – Major Progress Program. MPP was a 2 year program for smart kids. it had a different kind of curriculum, supposedly excellerated, etc. we had 2 teachers – Mr Schoell and Mrs Sealover. my parents thought it was a good idea, so i switched elementary schools and was put into the class. halfway through 4th grade Mrs Sealover broke her leg and was out the rest of the year. the first part of 5th grade, she got the strep virus in her leg, and was out for another half a year. She was probably in her 50s when i was in the class. She taught the english/social studies part of the program. Mr Schoell taught the math/science part of the program. I have no idea how old he was…he said he was 200 years old, born on Maypril 25th (or something like that).

a few years ago Mrs Sealover retired because she was getting alzheimers disease. she died a few years ago. she was not that old.

i just found out today that Mr Schoell never retired. he taught MPP until he died. apparently he’s dead. i don’t know when this happened, but my parents found out at the wedding they went to on saturday. my mom told me today. my dad was the one who found out, and you know how men are – never ask the important questions like when and how. he sent birthday cards out to all his students until we turned 16. i saw him at the high school play in 98 believe. so sometime in the last 4 years he died, and i think it was more recently…

it’s strange…so many of my teachers have died. mr schoell (4th & 5th grade), mrs sealover (4th & 5th grade), mr warnike (who i never had, but was in the middle school when he died), mrs benson (7th grade), mrs forton (7th & 9th grade), mr skibinski (never had, but he taught french in high school), mr frank (never had, taught physics in high school), high school principal (forget his name, he never knew who i was anyway), mr guido (9th grade biology)….9…9 teachers of mine have died. 5 from the high school. it’s just bizzare. and of course, those are only the deaths i know about. who knows what happened to mrs dulak, my kindergarten teacher. or mrs malchow…2nd grade…i think my 3rd grade teacher might have died….some of my other middle school teachers might have…

maybe i can find an obit on mr schoell.

 

*2015 edit* Turns out he wasn’t dead at the time of this post, because he actually died years later, and I intended to go to the funeral however I could not wake up in time.

 

also. bill and leah gave me computer speakers from leah’s parents computer, cuz they didn’t want them. i gave them my old hamster cage. LOL not really a fair trade. but omg these speakers rock so hard. altec lansing brand, came with their dell computer. after i figured out why sound only came out of 1 speaker, they sound great. 2 speakers and a subwoofer. now i only wish my cd drive was connected to my sound card so i could play real cds in it. *drools over the possibilities*

 

*blogging alot of nothing today*

i desperately want to go to europe. i want to go travel europe for a month or so. i’d just go by myself too. that’d be fine. get me some maps, find some destinations…just go. go where the wind took me. that’d be so great. i feel as if i really need that. i need to get away from here for a while.

reasons why i’m not going to go to europe:
– no money
– no job to get money
– 500$+ in bills per month starting in november
– no money to pay for the bills, let alone pay for a month long trip in europe.
– no more money in the stock market anymore
– i’d probably lose whatever job i had if i was going to request a month off to go “find myself” in europe.

i feel like getting in my car and just driving. not running away, i think i’m a bit old for that. just leaving and not coming back for a while. julie did that. randomly drove to ARIZONA one night. i wish i had the guts. she lived there for a few months to a year, and then drove back. jackie sorta did that too. she’s been a bohemian for years now. i wonder what she’s up to now, or even where she is. she checks in with the old #mjfans gang every now and then. she visited em in salt lake city last year, and then hopped a train to cali and that’s the last anyone heard from her. my cousin elizabeth went to italy after high school and then didn’t want to come home. her parents flew to italy to drag her back to detroit. i wish i had the guts. damn my sense of responsibility.

 

gaaaaah!! carolyn informed me that there is going to be a Hedwig screening in toronto on august 24th. (day before tool) you get to MEET john cameron mitchell!!!!! and there are performances and stuff. must goooo!!! totally not driving to tool the next day then. hedwig thing is at 9pm, i’ll have to stay over nite, go home early on sunday. then eric can drive to tool lol. oh i have a dentist appt the 24th too…going to have to request off for work now. before i just said if you schedule me in the morning, i might be late.

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i really don’t feel like posting anything, but i guess i will. storms woke me up this morning, but once again they weren’t really storms. it was 5 min of rain, and 4 cracks of thunder. there was some during the night too. the thunder was odd, cuz it was really long, and made the ground shake.

bill and leah came up around 3. bill wanted to go look at drums so we went to guitar center before going to danielle’s. guitar center still has the big picture of ryan and amir up in the voyer hehe. fooled around there for a bit, and then went to danielle’s. had food, hung out, played pool the usual. we were going to go to hard rock cuz people wanted to buy merchandise and i get half off but we were waiting for eric to show up. then as soon as he did bill and leah left to go back to geneseo. so then it was just more playing pool and bitching about shit haha. that’s all we ever do – complain about stuff.

and now i’m home. wow. what the hell am i going to do for 3 more days off…

Posted in: Personal