booo

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so the sabres season is officially over 🙁 ottawa won in overtime to go on to the stanley cup finals. i guess i have to root for anaheim or detroit now. it was a great season. lots of fun, lots of excitement. they’ll be back in september. 🙂

today was leighanne’s wedding. it was a nice low key affair, very simple and not a silly waste of gobs of money hahaha. i just can’t stand hearing that ppls weddings cost 40k. that’s insanity. so it was nice. when i get drunk i get narcoleptic. i fell asleep in the bathroom. i felt like Zoe hahahahha. early night, where i fell asleep again haha. up now of course and nothing to do. my car is still at adr2s house since i was drunk/sleeping and unable to drive hahaha. feels sorta weird.

(and omg “gay disco song” version of only is on youtube. my fav only moment. would have been better had they been able to get someone yelling “gay disco songs fucking rock” at the end hahaha http://youtube.com/watch?v=ukajW525Mi4&mode=related&search=nine%20inch%20nails)

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very glad natasha didn’t win top model. she was fugly. that is all.

climbed cargill today. it smells like death even worse than last time. seriously SOMETHING is dead in there. the smell has radiated farther than it was radiating last time, and is SO bad you seriously can’t breathe it in without gagging. i wish i could spread the smell over the internet so you can all experience it haha. it’s THAT bad. but i suck cuz i forgot the london2 dvds for alex and adr2 (cuz at 2am yesterday after re-dling the files, i got it to burn with ashampoo) and alex’s cadbury eggs from london.

vh1 40 freakiest concert moments…nice. haven’t seen this one before. u2 stuck in the lemon made it hahahaha.

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sad saaad

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i think it’s safe to say i can sadly put away my jerseys for this season. the sabres need to win 4 games, and have 4 games to do it… 🙁 phill decided not to sell the game 5 tickets and go – if there even is a game 5 – so our final profit for the playoffs is about 500$ each. i’ll take it. haha. so go anaheim, i really don’t want to have to root for detroit against ottawa…

still can’t get this fucking dvd to burn. maybe if i delete everything, and dl the whole thing again something magical will happen and the files will work right and everything will be hunky dory. maybe tomorrow.

i was wicked depressed today. for no reason. still pushing ahead with my lower dosage of meds though. we’ll see where things go.

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computers suck

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i cannot burn the london2 dvd bootleg to save my life. i have tried everything i can think of. ok….nero won’t burn it because it claims there is no video information. nero showtime won’t play more than 30 seconds of it. but it plays, in its entirety as far as i can tell, in windows media player. so i downloaded ashampoo burning software. it doesn’t say there’s a problem with the files, but it claims the burn fails at like 50%. i thought hey, i’ll convert the vob files to mpeg, maybe that’ll work. so i did, the mpegs play just fine in windows media player, but still apparently have no video information 😛 winmp doesn’t burn dvds, but windows movie maker does, i’ll try that. nope, it claims there is only audio information and no video information. alright, i know, i’ll open the files in winmp, and resave them as mpegs with new names. did that, try to open them to burn in nero, no video information, just audio. WHAT THE FUCK. I CAN WATCH THE FUCKING THING SO THERE IS INDEED VIDEO INFORMATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i’m so frustrated. i wrecked 5 double layer dvdrs cuz i didn’t think there would be such a problem and they were all i had. i borrowed 3 reg dvdrs from my father until i can get to the store to buy more, but i don’t have any clue what to do next….save to avi and try to burn from that?(nope, didn’t work either) i guess that’s my next step. i really should be going to bed instead of doing this, but i think withdrawal from the meds has finally set in, and i can’t fall asleep in a timely manner to save my life…

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playoffs!

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Last night was game1 vs Ottawa. Through the first 2 rounds I didn’t think that atmosphere was the same as it was during the playoffs last year, and I thought it was because this time, we were expected to get to the playoffs, and get to the conference finals, and in 6 more games, get to play for the cup. Last year it was a bit of a surprise. But now, round 3, conference finals – it was nuts. So so loud in the arena, and everyone was just excited and crazy. That quickly went away as Ottawa scored twice in the 1st period. When it was tied, it was nuts again…but we lost 5-2. Wow did the place deflate. Walking out was quiet and so weird. It was foggy in the city too, it was just a surreal moment. Alas, a good thing about the loss…we played like shit haha. We didn’t lose because we played our best and Ottawa was better. So 6 more games to get 4 wins…

Since the playoffs started, this video montage has been played on tv and at the arena before each game, set to music by the hometown Goo Goo Dolls. And while I’m not one for sappy crap, it really is quite touching, and uplifting, and not just for hockey, but for the way it paints Buffalo. And of course, it’s on youtube…(and I must say, I hate that youtube reduces the quality of everything). They’ve been changing bits of it after each round, adding more game clips, and footage from the plaza parties, so i’m not sure which version this is, but it’s the same general idea hah

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southpark!

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someone find me the dvd bootleg of nin at brixton on 3/8. aweriasudf aewraseiruas dneed. neeeeeeeeed. can’t find!!!!!!!!! will explode! http://www.demonoid.com/files/details/1085469/12229857/

and dear lord, the “goobacks” southpark epsiode, possibly the most fucked up one i’ve ever seen. the gay sex. my god! haha “pissed off white trash red neck conservative” and “aging hippy liberal douche” hahahah “lets go to that part of town where all the future people moved to and start humping eachother…”

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time for some cryptic

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you make me sick. and i’m really quite surprised that you provoked such a violently sick to my stomach reaction. it was really unexpected, but maybe that’s because i don’t express my true feelings about you to anyone. repression is fun! tho it’s possible i didn’t quite know what those feelings were until this very moment. maybe realizing how utterly worthless you are is what gave me the sick feeling. or realizing what a joke you are. or hypocrite. or fake. or shallow. i could go on, but for what reason? it, and you, are really a giant waste of my time. i feel bad for those around you, because i know how things will end up.

i may forgive but i never forget.

 

(reading this in 2015, apparently I have forgotten, because I have no idea what this is about)

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this first comment is mainly for my own memory….in case i end up with some kind of blood borne illness (hiv, hep-c) it is possible that the lady who served me ice cream at de-dee’s dairy today was bleeding. i’m not positive (*insert tasteless joke*), it could have been cherries or something, but…gross. i also saw that they sell imitation dippin dots, so on game days where i’m not attending, there is a place to go to try to keep up the ritual…phill pointed out that being imitations they may have the opposite effect, so i’ll wait to see how we’re doing in this series before i try them out hehe. (yes, so lame)

and in other possible blood borne illness related news, i need a new tattoo. desperately need ideas. i looked through a bunch of tattoo magazines at the book store today with no inspiration. i don’t really want a picture of something, i want more of a design, and for some reason i keep thinking of vines or a vine like design, but that doesn’t seem to really “fit” with me…i’m not earthy and i hate nature. i like concrete and steel. it is to go on my other side, opposite “halo 14” but big…my whole side/ribs…gonna hurt tons but…i NEED something there. then there’s still the idea of an absinthe fairy, but…dunno if i want color or not…

i also had a dream about a wicked dress design, i may try it out on one of the free sabres shirts we got in the first 2 round games (and will be getting yet another one tomorrow) before i do it on something “good”. this design also inspired a possible alteration to some of the old army shirts i have, but we’ll see. i’m not quite good enough to resize things, it may wait til adr comes home for the summer.

the francis bacon exhibit opened at Albright-Knox art museum last week. so excited. i’ve only seen a handful of his work up close – most recently at one of the galleries visited in europe – so a whole exhibit *artgasm*! i need inspiration for crazy art for “the show”. i should continue to work on my “modern art bullshit” piece tonight since i have no plans. i’ve dropped the dosage of my meds by half, and i don’t feel any different…which is 1. good, i don’t want to kill myself 2. bad cuz i don’t feel crazy and i was sorta hoping i’d be at least a bit nuts from withdrawal to inspire art. i have been getting quite alot of headaches, i wonder if it’s from the drop in dosage…zoloft withdrawal info on the web has described “electric shock” sensations in the body…none of that, tho i think that might be kinda fun. but as we all know, i’m strange.

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i don’t recognize rose mcgowan in any recent pictures of her. dear lord did she get alot of work done. and she’s looking quite alot like michael jackson now.

for sale: round 3 games 2 and 5, 400$ for 2 tickets. phill and i are going to game 1 on thursday, and we were planning to go to game 5, it’s at 2pm til i remembered lei’s wedding….crap! i managed to go without any conflicts in 2 years of NIN tours but can’t make it through the playoff season without conflicts. grrr and damn detroit winning.

now, do i want to go to a blah summer festival tour – projekt revolution – headed by linkin park, just to see julien-k? julien-k is amir, ryan, whoever else from orgy’s side project. it’s august 18th. i so hate festivals…

i’m also seriously considering a trip back to europe with dan in the fall-ish…his china plans seem to be on the rocks and he suggested chernobyl…god, so tempting!!! i so don’t have any more time off! and as if he can read our minds…trent just announced shows in moscow and st petersburg….dear lord just make this even harder now

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talk about targeting to a specific audience…i just saw a diet pepsi commercial that uses beverly hills 90210 characters and theme song.

8 wins down 8 more to go. bring on ottawa!

tonight work almost made me want to be a better person, and find god, so i don’t go to hell. because that’s what tonight was. they closed the hotel gaming floor to do computer upgrades or something – except for 2 tables, bacarrat tables of course, and i have to be on one of them. the lack of slot machine noise made the horrible 90s radio station even louder/worse than normal. on top of that, i thought it was an hour later than it actually was. tony and i realized that this is what hell is like. bacarrat where IMMEDIATELY upon sitting down, matt called me lucifer – with a sound track including boys ii men, alanis, barenaked ladies, etc etc etc. the occasional good song made the situation purgatory, but the ratio of good to bad songs is like 1:7. alas. hell. i told tony i was going to have to go home and listen to some real metal, he suggested slayer ha.

spencer tunick did a new mass nude installation in mexico city – 18000 people!! we had a mere 1800. we got a mention in the article though…

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