dream

dream: i guess i was traveling or something, with a few people, and we didn’t really have any money. we had to find somewhere to sleep for the night, but with no money, we had to be like bums. for some reason we couldn’t sleep out in the open though. so we were looking for a place to sleep/hide and went down to these railroad tracks that were sunken compared to the rest of the city. we were trying to pick a place to sleep, on the tracks, but no one knew which tracks were still used or not. we eventually picked a place behind a semi truck. the next day we are trying to get back up to street level from the area where we slept and we ran into some other people who were hiding as well. they had found a way out of the sunken track area so we followed them. we went to get some food at a dunkin donuts and had to pay 11 dollars for a donut. we were like wow. but with the donut came a scratch off game card and i ended up winning a loan for 1700$. all i had to do was give the bank 70$ and i’d get 1700. then i was back at my parents house telling them about the loan and joanne was there, and told me that the loan would be administered by john malm. i freaked out and was all “there is no way i can work with john malm, i just can’t, that bastard stole all of trent’s money”. then there was all this drama about john malm, and he apparently was like a hit man too, which meant he was now after me. then i was at work but it was inside a school cafeteria. there were tons of people everywhere, at the games and inside the pits. the rumor was that john malm and his associates were in the building and looking for me, but i didn’t know what malm looked like. someone pulled me off my game suddenly because they thought malm was there and they were going to point him out to me. my dad was there too i guess trying to protect me, so he was playing roulette on my game just to make sure nothing happened. this person who was going to point out malm was pointing out people that worked for malm, and malm’s son. i almost wanted malm to confront me, so i could be all “so have you paid trent back yet?” i was going to go back onto my roulette game and so i was standing there waiting for the spin to end, and someone who was supposedly with malm had bet stacks and stacks of purple on the outside, and i thought nothing of it. then someone suddenly realized that his bet was waaaaaay over table max. so then greg was the pit boss and he had to call someone and ask about whether the bet could stay or not. i noticed someone else had played a stack of orange chips too, which was way over table max as well. greg got off the phone and came over and said “it all depends on the cash buy in and not the bet.” which makes no sense, but in the dream it meant that all the bets lost. so now the malm associates were super pissed off. i was told not to go back on the game, and then someone came over and gave a piece of paper to mary, who was suddenly in the pit with me. she asked what it was, and he said “oh you know what it’s about.” so she was reading the paper and getting upset, so i looked at what it said. it was a letter from some group saying that they weren’t going to let this horror movie go ahead and film in niagara falls. for all these different reasons that made no sense. then it said something about marilyn manson supporting the movie. reading the letter i got really pissed off cuz apparently i was working on the movie along with mary and some others. i knew the letter was somehow from malm as well, and i really wanted to confront him and be like, wtf you piece of shit. this whole time i really wanted my 1700$ loan and kept trying to figure out a way to get it without having to go through malm. then i guess i was in hiding again, in a room in someone’s basement, and they had a huge boa constrictor. adr2 was there and we were sitting there, and the snake came over and was sitting on her. she got tired of holding the snake so she put it on the shelf where it usually slept. but then it fell off, and went nuts, and turned into an aligator, and it kept thrashing around. whoever’s room this was came in and we were like, can you please do something about your aligator. we went into another room and adr2 turned into angela, and she was setting up some kind of artsy water thing…where water would shoot out from hidden spouts above and below you and make a pretty little show. she kept turning the water on to try things out, and it was spraying all over where i was sitting and i was like wtf. finally i went over and turned the water off and was like dear god, stop!

and i think that was it. wtf. john malm hahahahhahahaha

Jeff Martin in Buffalo

it’s been an eventful 2 days…well…for my life at least haha.

wednesday brought babysitting megan so jenn and jeff could go out. but by saying i babysat, that’s not really true. i was there, and i played with her, but adrienne was there too, and she changed and fed and put megan to bed. but wow she grew alot since i last saw her. and she came to answer the door. wasn’t expecting that haha. but it was fun. hung out with jenn and jeff a bit after they got home, then went to dennys and home.

and then my stomach exploded again. gah 2 times in 1 week.

good thing i went to the dr today. got a prescription again but i also have to go see a stomach specialist, and get a biopsy done or whatever happens when they stick a tube down your throat into your stomach. not til august though.

stopped at starbucks for a pomegranate frap, which wasn’t as good as i had hoped for. but i got a new book about the cold war. *dork*

tonight brought jeff martin at thursday in the square. adr and i headed down around 5, and found joe r. right up front. so joined him and watched burning paris. joe and i were both like, why do we know them? they were all in other bands we had seen before. haha. then jeff martin. i can’t say i’m too enthusiastic about his new stuff. i like dark and moody jeff martin of the tea party, not married father happy jeff martin. of all the tea party songs to do, they did “the messenger” barf. “turn the lamp down low” was good tho. and it turns out, i knew the keyboardist.

my favourite crappy band from the casino featured this really cute guy, but they still did bad versions of u2 songs among the other covers they did. they’d always play on sunday nights. recently i saw them and noticed cute guy was gone. that’s a shame. well cute guy is now the keyboardist for jeff martin. that’s quite a step up! congrats hahaha

so after the square we went to ihop for food before meeting adr2 and bliss at club diablo. ran into paul there, as well as the photographer i spent sunday with at the terminal. there really wasn’t anyone else there, and we totally took over the juke box. tons of nin. it turned into reminiscing night, and we had way more fun that we probably should have. had yummy drink that was basically malibu and pineapple juice, which i had been planning to order anyway. just big, and with a little devil hahah. so yeah. way too much fun.

going to try to get tuesday off to go see peaches in toronto. i got written up for my attendance, for my sick days without sick time. ppl keep thinking i called in to see trent, and i didn’t. i’ve actually been sick!

i wonder if it’s possible for women to become buddhist monks. just because, i’d really like to go join a monastary for a year. just leave life behind, learn what they have to teach me, live simple for a year, and then come back to life with a new perspective on things. shave my head. i think it would be really interesting and a great experience. was thinking about when mom and i stopped at the monastery in woodstock ny after our hike to overlook mountain house. i’d like to go there, not to like, the abbey near geneseo and make bread with the monks. *edit* well the place in woodstock has a 3 year 3 month meditative retreat…3 years is a long time tho…

anyway.

i really really hate that i can’t go into a citibank branch anymore. i don’t know what’s going on with my credit card. someone from one of the websites that my credit card was used at called this morning to ask if i made the charge. and i said no of course. but i can’t understand people on the phone so i don’t know what company she was from. looking at my statement it seems i have already been credited for 5 transactions by the companies they were made at…tho the amounts don’t exactly match. arg.

ok WHAT THE FUCK. now someone is using my credit card. i signed onto citicards to pay my statement and the site tells me to call customer service because of high risk activity…ok what? i look at my statement from the 29th until now and i have all these charges for online calling cards, a charge from london and other stuff that the lady on the phone said but that isn’t on my online statement. i didn’t say anything to the lady, other than give her my account number, and she started rattling off all these charges, and i’m like WTF. the charges listed so far are for 10$, 10$, $4.81, $50 and $10.78 and the charges she mentioned were higher amounts.

and in the last 2 minutes that it took me to call her ulcer reared its head. omg i’m dying.

and now that citibank became M&T i have no citibank branch to go in to ask about my credit card. the lady is cancelling the account, sending me a new card, and all this stuff to fill out for the fraudulent charges.

i’m getting sick. woke up stuffy this morning, which happened the day after the toronto show too, but this time it didn’t go away. and i’ve had a sneeze stuck in my nose for the last 8 hours, and i just can.not.sneeze to save my life. ug. i should have stayed at work, since they had a spot for me at 4, but i just want to sleep. for the first time in 13 weeks i do not have a 10-6 shift next weekend, so i’ll be getting a 40 hour check finally next week. and with no late starts, that means i can be up “early” if anyone wants to explore. will have to see what the others have in store…

and now my legs definitely hurt. it’s my calves more than my thighs oddly…

Happy Days of Young Sheep: I’m a sheep, young handsome sheep. They say every sheep looks like me very much. But look at them carefully. Their faces are a little bit difference. So I’m lonesome sheep. Would you date me?

printed on Japanese stationery

ha

thursday turned into an interesting day. i was expecting to hear from drie who was in town with an explorer from dallas about going to bct. met them at the building around 4:30 and did that and the roof. they were headed to toronto to meet up with ian and kowalski for dinner and invited me. sure. i had nothing else to do.

picked up kowalski on the side of the road near union station then drove around to find a place to eat. ended up at an italian place in the gaybourhood. ian met us there. great food. after that we decided to go crane climbing. that’s a first. i’m not a climber. so we drove out to the cityplace construction sites but were foiled there, lots of activity. and it was like midnight at this point. so we went off to the college park site. no problem. got inside easily and took the stairs up to the 26th floor where we encountered a locked door. shit. i half jokingly asked if the elevators worked. and they did. so we bypassed the locked floor and continued our way up. 52 floors. yikes. i almost died. somewhere in the 30s we heard music. crap. someone else was in the building with a radio on one of the 20s floors. oh well, we were already this far…once we got to the roof i was way too tired to climb the crane. that and i decided that i have no problem with heights if i’m on something solid, but i don’t think i would have done well on the crane. so i chilled there while the rest of them went up. then we all hung out on the roof for another hour probably. so on the way down the man with the radio had moved up to the 40th floor. we got by him though, and took the elevator the rest of the way down hahahahahah.

took ian to his car, took kowalski home, and drove back here for drie and brian to crash on my floor.

69 flights of stairs yesterday. my ass and thighs better be stunning now. surprisingly, my legs don’t hurt, but my ankle does…

so my mom and aunt when cleaning out my grandma’s house found a scrapbook under the couch. my mom asked if i ever remembered grandma talking about how she was mad at grandpa for calling up an ex-girlfriend molly and talking to her for like 2 hours on new years some year. i said no. never heard that one.

my mom often would find random words cut out of newspapers and magazines around the house, stuffed in books, and always thought it was weird.

the scrapbook contained paragraph after paragraph, each different, completely formed out of cut out words and letters, by my grandma, about this woman molly, and how she was a slut and a whore and a “good time charlie”. obsess much?

my mom wonders now if my grandpa maybe had an affair. not that it would have surprised any of us.

but my grandma was completely and crazy obsessive about it. i asked if i could have the scrap book and mom said they threw it out. WTF?! that’s EXACTLY the kind of crazy shit that i like!

god work sucked ass today. mr scheduler had been doing better once i complained about being on midibacc 8 out of 9 days. i’ve only had it about once a week since then. now it’s been 2 out of 3 days. but i said i’ll be optimistic, and try to be in a better mood about having to deal that piece of shit game. and everything was going fine until Most Hated Player Ever showed up. i thought i was safe at first because he wasn’t on my table. but he came over and kicked his friend out of the seat at my game so he could play. that’s pretty normal for MHPE. that’s when shit hit the fan however. the friend went to give me his 500$ in green chips to change into black chips, and his finger is gushing blood from a bandaid he had on. so i said there was no way in hell i was touching those chips. the guy tries to hide his hand behind his back as if i didn’t see blood dripping down his finger. and it’s getting worse, his whole hand is now covered, and i’m not touching those fucking chips. luckily i had big steve as my floor, and he doesn’t take any shit. so he told them that we absolutely were not going to touch those chips. well the friend leaves to go get bandaged up again, but doesn’t take the chips and MHPE starts trying to play them. and i’m like I AM NOT TOUCHING THOSE CHIPS! and he’s all, oh it’s ok, no blood on them. no it’s fucking not ok you piece of shit. so in the end there was lots of yelling, and me refusing to touch the chips, and him trying to play them again once steve went on break, as if i wasn’t going to notice and touch bloody fucking chips. finally xiao in whatever language got him to take the chips to the cage.

but then after that came all the back betting and usual bullshit that comes along with MHPE and the rest of those fuckers. i fucking hate that game. every one of them should die. i eventually asked to be taken off and moved, so i ended the last 2 hours on pai gow.

and on top of everything i just feel generally unwell. my stomach is just not happy, it doesn’t matter what i eat or do. it’s not the total world is ending pain of when the ulcer is bad. it’s just slight nausea, slight indigestion, stomach making noises etc. general feeling of sick. but it all makes me nervous that suddenly it’ll change to world ending pain, and i can’t function at that point. i have a dr appt on the 13th but i just got a letter that the NP i usually see left the practice. so i have to call and reschedule with one of the 2 remaining doctors. arg.

and the gas company called me today about the note i sent them with the bills i keep getting for the old apartment. i didn’t feel like answering the phone, and i assume they’ll be closed tomorrow. will have to tackle that wed i guess. and call about a dr bill that i don’t know why i got. and figure out if my paycheck actually got deposited into my bank account when this weekend my bank switched to m&t and there were a few days of bank limbo when my check would normally appear in my account.

oh, and in the news today a woman was found dead (but not murdered) at michigan central station. she so totally was not there on the 25th when we stopped by before the show.