no one can ever be happy for you

I applied for a promotion at work a few weeks ago. I wasn’t sure I had a chance in getting it, despite being qualified, because there were only 2 positions open and a lot of interest from very good candidates. But I got it. !!! Yay!

That’s the good news. The bad news is now half my coworkers are pissed off and talking shit.

I’ve gotten a variety of reactions, from sincere congratulations, and people being glad that management finally made a good decision, to surprise, and to insincere congratulations and anger.

I was surprised myself, because the way things have gone in the past, management seemed to always know who they wanted for the positions, and the interviews were rather irrelevant. So everyone assumed who the 2 were going to be, and that didn’t include me. I’m hoping the people who were surprised at the choice to promote me were surprised for this reason, and not because they don’t think I can do the job. (And that does seem to be the case.)

In one way, the anger I understand, as it’s coming from other applicants. I got the job, and they didn’t, so that’s fine. However some of it’s a bit misguided because some of the applicants thought they were basically guaranteed the job but I got it instead and they are incredulous that I could have possibly gotten it.

Do I really need to go through my qualifications? Do people really think I’m not going to do a good job, or that they would be better at it? Is 13 years with the company, 4 in management, plus previous management training and experience not count? Does my 4 year college degree not count?

So I’ve gotten some congratulations from these people, but they seem to be half hearted, and I’d rather they not say anything at all. But I suppose it’s better than the cold shoulder, and an unwillingness to help me, which I experienced last night on the craps game.

I know the “experience” thing comes down to craps. I am the first to admit I do not have a lot of experience dealing craps, but you know what? Neither do a lot of our current managers (including one of the shit talkers who is already in the position I just got) and they are able to do their jobs just fine. The candidates who have a ton of experience are upset that they got passed over by someone without the knowledge they have, I understand. But maybe they should look at the other requirements of the job, at their personal performance, etc before they criticize me and my ability that hasn’t even been demonstrated yet. If I end up sucking at the job and being unable to perform duties related to managing a craps game, then by all means, criticize me. Or help me and teach me what I need to know to properly manage the game, which has little to do with being able to actually deal it proficiently. That’s why on the list of requirements of the job “management knowledge” is all that is needed in a game if you have enough experience in all the other games (which I do.)

I shouldn’t be upset at the “hate-orade” and shit talking, because upper management, the people who matter, chose me to do the job. They think I can do it, and do it well. But it feels shitty to thank a person for their help and advice before my interview, to have them congratulate me and offer their help in training, only to find out they told other people that they don’t agree with my being chosen, that I don’t have enough experience. It feels shitty to work with another applicant and have them not speak to you at all. It sucks to have to wonder who really is happy for me and wants me to succeed, and who is talking shit about me to everyone else.

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